Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

You think you’re raising your kids right, and then one of them decides to be a fan of your football team’s arch rival.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

If you ever find yourself mad at me, put a cape on so you can be super mad.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

I haven’t even gone to bed yet and I already can’t wait to get home from work tomorrow.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

I’m developing a new fragrance for introverts. It’s called: “Leave me the fuh cologne”.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

“Grey’s Anatomy” but it’s told entirely through the lens of the hospital’s HR department.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

“Dating pool” is incredibly optimistic. More like dating drainage.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.