Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Dating profiles should make you share a sound bite of you sneezing.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Imagine being social on social media.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Commenting “This could be us” on her pics with her boyfriend.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

If we start flirting now, we could be in matching pajamas on a Christmas card before the holidays.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

The ’90s were a time of blissful ignorance where we expected rock stars to sleep with groupies.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I always make sure the garage door is shut. Wouldn’t want hoodlums stealing the stuff I’ve been meaning to get rid of for years.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

I just realized boobytrap backwards spells partyboob.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,513

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Just landed via Reddit:

I am under no obligation to make sense to you.

Freshly posted on Discord:

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

Making waves on YouTube:

The nicest thing I’ve done for a date is turn up.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

Just landed via Telegram:

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I always imagined WWIII would be Earth vs. aliens.

Shared recently on Slack:

The Bloodhound Gang were very special because its music for 12-year-old boys, but every reference requires you to be 40 years old.

Trending via TikTok:

Caught my son chewing on electrical wires. So, I grounded him. He’s doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Finally, a TV that understands my midnight snack struggles! 🍿😋🔊"

chips, control, eating, eating chips, humor, increase, joke, real, relatable, smart, smart TV, snack, snack humor, technology, TV, TV joke, volume, volume control

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

0

1 month ago

anxiety, hobby, humor, panicking, stress
Dear music, thanks!

0

2 weeks ago

dear, gratitude, humor, music, thanks
Why is it called “free time” when I use it to spend all my money?

0

2 months ago

finance, free, free time, humor, i, irony, leisure, money, spend, spending, time
“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

0

2 months ago

age, getting, grandparent, grandparents, having, humor, i, nostalgia, realization, realize, upstairs, vacuum, where
Stephen King’s It is the bone chilling story about adults who are forced to spend time with their childhood friends.

0

2 months ago

adults, bone, bone chilling, childhood, childhood friend, chilling, forced, friend, friends, humor, IT, king, kings, spend, stephen, Stephen King, story, time
These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

0

2 months ago

break, funny observation, humor, lunch, lunch break, observation, relatability, time, weekend

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on X this month:

I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.

99 shares on Threads this month:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

10 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m like if a birthday card with no money inside was a person.

31 shares on TikTok this month:

One day my sanity went out for smokes and never came back.

45 shares on Twitch this month:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

64 shares on Messenger this month:

Shouldn’t autocorrect be called autoassume?

19 shares on X this month:

Reverse cowgirl so I can bend backward and look at him like the Exorcist.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.

26 shares on Pinterest this month:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

85 shares on Twitch this month:

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

We should all start texting each other like old time explorers. ‘Dearest friend, I have survived another week. The horrors persist.’

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

“Apple Music has better sound quality!” Okay, but my entire life is on Spotify, my playlists are my children.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

If you gain 4 pounds in one weekend, that just means you’re an overachiever.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Kinda miss when crushes were butterflies instead of complex emotional calculations about compatibility and red flags.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Someday I’ll learn how to emotion like a proper human.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

I forgot my password, failed the captcha and have been accused of being a robot. I don’t even know how to fight these allegations.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Tried a smile yesterday and my white blood cells attacked it.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

Those security guards at the Samsung store are Guardians of the Galaxy.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Sometimes it feels better not to talk. At all. About anything. To anyone.

Making waves on WeChat:

Doctors diagnosed me as your future wife.

Just shared via Threads:

An adventure and a dragon would cure me.

Seen just now on Discord:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Whatever y’all heard about me, I’m way worse.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

By the time I meet the right person, I’ll probably be the wrong person.

Just landed via TikTok:

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Santa went woke and gave me a small solar panel instead of coal.

Going bananas on X:

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

Dear music, thanks!

Why is it called “free time” when I use it to spend all my money?

“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

Stephen King’s It is the bone chilling story about adults who are forced to spend time with their childhood friends.

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨