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Commentary:
"Aliens chose to journey through vast galaxies and reach Earth, only to land in New Jersey? 🌌👽 Must've heard they have out-of-this-world diners and killer bagels! 🥯🛸"

alien, aliens, fiction, here, humor, Jersey, joke, light, light year, new, New Jersey, science, science fiction, travel, visit, year

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

0

2 months ago

90, communication, culture, history, humor, idiot, know, media, post, reference, simply, social, social media, talking, time, world
Imagine you and me as cows in Switzerland, enjoying the view and saying “moo” every day.

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5 months ago

animal, conversation, cow, day, enjoying, every, humor, imagination, imagine, me, moo, nature, saying, Switzerland, view
She said she liked animals but apparently all the fruit flies around my apartment was a “turn off”

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2 months ago

animals, apartment, date, fly, fruit, fruit fly, humor, pest, relationship, turn, turn off
Everyone deserves a day to lie in bed naked and be anti-social. Just sayin’.

0

2 months ago

anti-social, bed, day, everyone, humor, just, lie, naked, relaxation, self-care, self-indulgence, solitude
Sorry, I didn’t text back. I don’t like talking to people anymore.

0

3 months ago

anxiety, apology, back, communication, humor, i, interaction, introvert, people, social, social anxiety, social interaction, sorry, talking, text, texting
Fun fact: a person’s music taste can actually tell their intelligence level.

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5 months ago

actually, fact, fun, fun fact, humor, intelligence, intelligence level, level, music, music taste, person, psychology, taste, tell

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on Pinterest this month:

Intermittent fasting is how I drive, not how I eat.

11 shares on X this month:

I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

70 shares on Telegram this month:

Keeping my mouth shut is usually not enough to avoid an argument with my husband. I also have to deactivate the subtitle function on my face.

63 shares on WeChat this month:

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

92 shares on YouTube this month:

You’ll be having a good day and then someone your age says they’re buying a house.

89 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The sun really clocks out for the day before I do. That’s insane.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m currently on a really effective diet called “I only have twenty dollars until payday”.

91 shares on Reddit this month:

You look like something I drew with my left hand.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

I sexually identify as a microwave dinner, because I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my photos, and I’m just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you’re desperate.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Hundreds, nay, thousands of movies about falling in love but only one movie about a beach that makes you old.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

I met the real Santa tonight, and he said you’re all in trouble.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

I like to stay grounded by keeping the weight of the world on my shoulders.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Am I just an Untitled Document to you?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Foolproof? Yeah, well we’ll see about that.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

I tried to walk like an Egyptian and now I need to see a Cairo practor.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

Just shared via X:

Welcome to your 40’s: you get excited about avocados now.

Seen just now on YouTube:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Halloween is over and most people just keep on being creepy.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Sometimes you need to turn the music up louder and sort your shit out.

Breaking via Slack:

Sorry I’m late — I was standing in the shower, thinking about stuff.

Going viral on Slack:

The fastest mammal on earth is the smartass on the web.

Just shared via Twitch:

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Reading Shakespeare for the first time is crazy because you go, “Oh, that’s where that comes from,” every other page.

Trending via Discord:

According to my chocolate advent calendar, there are only 4 days until Christmas.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Aliens traveled millions of light years to get here to visit New Jersey.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

Imagine you and me as cows in Switzerland, enjoying the view and saying “moo” every day.

She said she liked animals but apparently all the fruit flies around my apartment was a “turn off”

Everyone deserves a day to lie in bed naked and be anti-social. Just sayin’.

Sorry, I didn’t text back. I don’t like talking to people anymore.

Fun fact: a person’s music taste can actually tell their intelligence level.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨