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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

I’m sorry I lied to you. I only did it for material gain. And to cause you psychological harm. And to prove I’m smarter than you.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

A pet resting their little paw on you is a sign of respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Talking to some people is like folding a fitted sheet.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

I’m doing a challenge called ‘November’ — it’s where I just try to get through every day in the month of November.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Drove by a woman with her car broke down, I was going to stop and help until I remembered I don’t know anything about cars or women.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

“Clean” my shower? Then what? Give my car a ride into town?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Guy who thinks “generational trauma” means it’s like the goat of trauma.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,304

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Snapchat:

There comes a time in everyone’s life when you hear the newest slang, and you decide that you don’t care enough to know what it means.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

You used to calm me on my cell phone!

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

Going viral on TikTok:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with her.

Trending via Slack:

If I could be in two places at once, I’d be in bed twice.

Spotted on YouTube:

Every day we get closer and closer to Idiocracy coming true.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.

Live now on TikTok:

I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Just shared via Twitch:

Moms be like, “I needed this,” and it’s really just a break from being the one who holds it all together every single day.

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?

2 months ago

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Commentary:
"Because who needs a foyer when you can trip over shoes and pets as soon as you enter? 🚪🐶👟 #WelcomeChaos"

American, American culture, architecture, culture, design, door, front, front door, homes, house, house design, humor, interior, interior design, living, room, strange, why

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Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on WeChat this month:

If I’m giving you attention, feel blessed. My real passion is ignoring people.

81 shares on Reddit this month:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

99 shares on X this month:

Having a crush on someone as an adult feels like a humiliation ritual.

78 shares on Instagram this month:

Humanity doesn’t always make a compelling case for its continued existence.

69 shares on Facebook this month:

If you’re bored when you’re alone, obviously you’re in bad company.

80 shares on Facebook this month:

All strapless bras need to be taken off the shelves. A total recall. We do not have the technology yet.

93 shares on Facebook this month:

Things will be fine, eventually—in thousands of years—for rocks.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

82 shares on Discord this month:

Problems are like balls. Everyone thinks they have bigger ones than you.

19 shares on Snapchat this month:

Do you mind if I become the object of your desire? No worries if not.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

Good news, I just decided I don’t care about anything anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

God: “I genuinely don’t remember making you all this stupid.”

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

The only hot singles in my area are in my wallet.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Girls really only want one simple thing; and that one thing is all of your attention.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

These quiet electric cars are really annoying. I have to stop scrolling and look up while walking outside now.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Most venomous snakes just make “Tsssss”. But I know some that say “Hi”.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

I need to find hobbies that don’t include my debit card.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next.

Going viral on Discord:

I speak for everyone when I say that finding the balance between watching movies, watching TV shows, and playing video games is harder than any job.

Trending via Snapchat:

If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The class: “You want us to do what?” Super Mario: “Jump around, catch and eat the giant mushroom, bang your head against the crates and, if necessary, crush all the critters. It’sa easy!”

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Slowly I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Who really needs jetpacks, I want to be able to start over from my last save point.

Spotted on Reddit:

You don’t need fun to have alcohol.

Making waves on WeChat:

Getting a second opinion about my Tamagotchi’s health.

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Activity Log ✨

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?

Today I went for a walk with a girl, she noticed me, so we went for a run.

None of this is happening. It’s all in your phone.

I’m capable of doing a lot of things but listening to people chew their food is not one of them.

I don’t like how monkeys have taken ownership of the whole banana thing. I bet I like bananas almost as much as they do.

Seems like the ‘how to use a fire extinguisher’ video on YouTube shouldn’t have a 30-second ad before it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?

Keep the laugh going 😂

I’m perfectly approachable as long as you’re carrying a plate of nachos.

Today I went for a walk with a girl, she noticed me, so we went for a run.

None of this is happening. It’s all in your phone.

I’m capable of doing a lot of things but listening to people chew their food is not one of them.

I don’t like how monkeys have taken ownership of the whole banana thing. I bet I like bananas almost as much as they do.

Seems like the ‘how to use a fire extinguisher’ video on YouTube shouldn’t have a 30-second ad before it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨