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Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

76 Funny door quotes

Funny door quotes add a humorous spin to the everyday act of entering and exiting! 🚪😂 Whether it’s witty remarks about knocking or playful observations about doors that just won’t cooperate, these quotes capture the lighter side of something as simple as a door. Enjoy a laugh as you look at doors in a whole new way! 😄🔑

There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

If I worked for UPS, there would be a 100% chance I’m falling out that open door when I turn a corner too fast.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.

Posted onMay 30, 2026

Sarcastically saying “you’re welcome” to the people who don’t say thank you when I hold the door for them is something I’ll never stop doing.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

Just realized doors really are floating in the air 24/7. I don’t like that.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

In all the movies, Santa never goes to the house directly next door. He always gets in his sleigh and flies off like 20 miles east.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

If I had a tiny girlfriend, I would love to throw her across gaps so she can pull levers and open doors that get me to her part of the level.

Posted onMay 29, 2026

What age will I grow out of not answering the door when I’m home and sneaking around the house to find out who’s knocking?

Posted onMay 29, 2026

I could be staring at my hand locking my front door, and I still won’t feel 100% sure my front door was locked.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Texting is so boring. Just show up to my door with roses.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Aliens probably lock their doors when they fly past Earth.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

My door camera alerts are all just me stepping outside to see how warm it is.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

Automatic doors that don’t open fast enough make me look dumb.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

‘Another bombshell has entered the villa!’ I say to myself as I walk in the front door of my own home.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Posted onMay 27, 2026

Pugs look like regular dogs that ran into a door at full speed.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

Aliens are coming to Earth, people are going to the Moon, and I am still pushing on a door that says pull.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?

Posted onMay 27, 2026

Thanks for leaving my door open; I was running low on houseflies.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Not a religious man but I do say a short prayer whenever I open a gas station restroom door.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors and windows, before any inspirational quotes get in.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

A bird just flew into our glass door. Іt’s not dead. Just really embarrassed.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

Life would be so much easier if you could push a button that makes dickheads fall through a trap door in the floor.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

An Advent Calendar for adults but behind every door is a different kind of anxiety medication.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

I taped a picture of my paycheck on my front door to keep all the solicitors away.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

When a door closes in life, sometimes it’s better to grab a hammer and nails and make sure the damn thing stays shut.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

I don’t have a welcome mat at my front door because I’m not a liar.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

When the doorbell rings, I always go to the door with my jacket on. Depending on who it is, I either just want to leave or have just come home.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

My childhood led me to believe that as an adult I’d have to contend with truth serum, lava, quicksand, trap doors, and secret passageways. So far it’s mostly been weight gain and existential dread.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

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