Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

People who accuse me of delusions of grandeur, obviously don’t worship me enough.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

The year flies by when you’re scrolling.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

It’s weird that Usher doesn’t have any songs about showing people to their seats.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Just washed my windows and not a single bloke came out and said ‘You can do mine next!’ This used to be a real country.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

I’m at the age where an uncomfortable bed will have me injured for a couple of days.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

I don’t know why doctors only give stickers to kids? Like, hello, I was also brave today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,721

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

Can’t stand when I’m determined to see something in a negative light, and somebody offers a different, healthier perspective. I already made up my mind to be upset. Don’t be rude.

Just landed via Messenger:

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

Just landed via Instagram:

Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

Just shared via TikTok:

Having a low-quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.

Trending via TikTok:

The sexual tension between me and vanishing without context is insane.

Shared recently on X:

Eating Chinese takeout is never as depressing as in the movies. It usually is good.

Spotted on Reddit:

At some point, I need to admit my ‘guilty pleasure’ music taste is just my music taste now.

Just landed via Instagram:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

The only thing I worry about when I’m in the restroom is if people are washing their hands or not.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Apparently, “spite” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oops, guess I'd better cross "petty revenge" off my resume's skills section! 🤨😅

answer, apparently, funny response, humor, inappropriate, inappropriate answer, interview, interview question, job, job interview, motivation, question, response, spite

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love it when God gives me money.

0

3 months ago

God, gratitude, humor, i, love, me, money
“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

0

2 months ago

cart, deserve, humor, indulgence, retail, retail therapy, self-care, sh, shopping, therapy, treat, yourself
When fireworks were invented, it was ‘hisssss’ to ‘wheeeee’ in the making.

0

2 months ago

celebration, excitement, fireworks, fun, hiss, invention, making, sound, wheee
“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

0

2 months ago

alcohol, answer, asked, beautiful, beautiful woman, dating, humor, inappropriate, inappropriate answer, interview, job, job interview, situation, social, social situation, weakness, woman, women, workplace
When I watch hockey, I pretend they’re fighting over the last Oreo.

0

2 months ago

fighting, hockey, i, last, Oreo, over, pretend, watch
Look at you with tape over your camera, while Amazon, Facebook, and Google have your whole life on file.

0

3 months ago

Amazon, camera, camera tape, collection, data, data collection, Facebook, file, Google, information, life, over, personal, personal information, privacy, surveillance, tape, technology, while, whole

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Slack this month:

One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

36 shares on X this month:

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

97 shares on Reddit this month:

The meteorologist who devised the wind chill factor has died. He was 86, but he felt like 75.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

Pornhub be like “Your phone got a virus,” bro, just play the bloody video.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

My boss said he likes how I remain so calm under pressure. Can’t tell him it’s because I don’t give a shit.

31 shares on X this month:

Music just makes living on this earth a little bit more bearable.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

So many mistakes to make, so little time.

22 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s so unfair that saying “xd” is still socially acceptable, but only if you’re speaking Spanish.

75 shares on Facebook this month:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

That looks like a problem for someone else.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

We need a slur for people who use ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

It’s weird when you realize we are the last generation on this Earth to know what lite was like before social media.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s always “you’re so cute when you’re mad,” until the house is on fire.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

For my final act of love, I will never contact you again, but think of you always.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

I don’t think astronauts should be allowed to come back. You made your choice.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

This meeting could have been an oil painting.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

If the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree, my kids are screwed.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Shoutout to video games, man. I love having a reason to live.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

Going viral on Snapchat:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Having a car is crazy cause you gotta take it to the car doctor.

Shared recently on Slack:

“Don’t let me keep you!” Translation: Please go.

Just shared via Facebook:

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

Trending via Reddit:

Let’s all stand up against iron deficiency (but not too fast).

Just shared via Twitch:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

Spotted on Messenger:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

Live now on Slack:

Crazy how many organs in your body are dedicated to the poopification of dinner.

Shared recently on WeChat:

You know the trouble with real life? There’s no danger music.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Apparently, “spite” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I love it when God gives me money.

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

When fireworks were invented, it was ‘hisssss’ to ‘wheeeee’ in the making.

“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

When I watch hockey, I pretend they’re fighting over the last Oreo.

Look at you with tape over your camera, while Amazon, Facebook, and Google have your whole life on file.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨