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Commentary:
Looks like Santa's got a side hustle as a debt collector! 🎅📜💸 Better pay up or your gifts might just be coal this year! 😂🎁 #HohohoFunds

always, Christmas, finance, holiday, humor, invoice, joke, outstanding, payment, reference, seasonal, time

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Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

1 month ago

adult, functioning, humor, identity, interpretation, loose, welcome
Remember when downloading a song in under 5 minutes was considered progress?

1 month ago

5, downloading, internet, internet speed, minutes, nostalgia, patience, progress, remember, song, speed, technology, under
Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

1 month ago

20, attic, box, humor, humor about unused items, i, items, keep, long-term, next, nice, preservation, sarcasm, should, storage, unused
I used to love going out with people. Now I weigh the pros and cons of human interaction, like it’s a business decision.

4 months ago

business, business decision, cons, decision, decision making, going, human, human interaction, humor, i, interaction, introversion, love, making, people, pros, pros and cons, socializing, used, weigh
The only thing longer than the opening ceremony of the Olympics is the opening ceremony of my eyes in the morning.

1 month ago

ceremony, eyes, humor, morning, Olympics, opening, opening ceremony, sleep, thing, wake up
Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

1 month ago

confusion, definitely, hate, here, humor, imagine, irony, just, me, over, remember, self-deprecation, spell, spelling, thoughts, trying

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

They say half the battle of getting in shape is mental, so I thought about the gym really hard today.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

It sucks when a woman realizes that her knight in shining armor was actually just a moron wrapped in tinfoil.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

I don’t believe the phrase “if they wanted to, they would,” because I want to, and I don’t.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Incredibly annoying that exercising, eating right, and drinking water can make you actually feel good.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Girls be like “forget it, I’m fine” then set your house on fire.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

The people that ask Grok everything are the same people that follow Google Map directions straight into a lake.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Messages are way funnier when you know how the person talks.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.

Just landed via Pinterest:

In my years of experience, people who disagree with me are usually wrong.

Trending via Twitch:

An adult is a person who makes noise when they stand up.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I am a fool everyday, I don’t need a holiday for it.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Zombies only eat brains, so you are safe.

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Activity Log ✨

At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

Remember when downloading a song in under 5 minutes was considered progress?

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

I used to love going out with people. Now I weigh the pros and cons of human interaction, like it’s a business decision.

The only thing longer than the opening ceremony of the Olympics is the opening ceremony of my eyes in the morning.

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Establish dominance by asking your dentist if he’s flossing everyday.

“Be the bigger person” sounds too much like “accept the disrespect”.

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

So much anger in this small little body. I feel like a chihuahua.

The worst part about waking up is all the remembering.

The longer you go without something, the more comfortable you become without it. That goes for people, too.

Iced coffee and crying, the most Californian afternoon.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

Next time I lose my mind I swear I’m not even going to look for it any more.

Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

My hair dryer is so powerful that it doubles as my leaf blower.

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

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At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

Remember when downloading a song in under 5 minutes was considered progress?

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

I used to love going out with people. Now I weigh the pros and cons of human interaction, like it’s a business decision.

The only thing longer than the opening ceremony of the Olympics is the opening ceremony of my eyes in the morning.

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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