Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

You know where I’d like to go? Missing.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

I used to schedule naps, but now they’re little surprise parties my body throws at all hours of the day.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Don’t listen to them, little password. You are strong.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Why do women complain about size but moan when fingered?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

People who take care of chickens are literally chicken tenders.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

If I shook my head at every stupid thing I saw, I’d have permanent whiplash.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

It’s not the destination that matters. It’s the snacks you eat on the way.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Gambling is all about getting something for nothing and spending thousands of dollars trying to do it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,370

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

No matter how bad your day seems, just remember that someone out there has line danced to Achy Breaky Heart.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed their chest because of their belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

Just landed via Facebook:

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Worst thing about cutting off all your hair is you go to work and everyone treats you like Today’s Special Boy.

Making waves on WeChat:

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

Trending via YouTube:

I realized being an adult is just feeling too tired to function, and then functioning.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I made all my money in the 80s selling Rubik’s Hammers. They were for those cubes that thought they were smarter than you.

Trending via LinkedIn:

When I put on weight, it’s around my stomach. When I lose weight, it’s around my legs. I’m not a structural engineer, but that can’t be good.

Just shared via X:

Accidentally became important at work and it’s ruining my life.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“You’ve changed!” Yeah, I don’t like you.

At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

Funny text about avoiding questions at therapy, playful and relatable.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Therapist: "How are you today?"
Me: "Let's not sweat the small stuff. Or the big stuff. 😂🤷‍♂️🛋️"

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

76 shares on Telegram this month:

All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.

73 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m quitting my job to do topless tarot readings on the beach.

57 shares on TikTok this month:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

67 shares on Facebook this month:

Apparently the thirstiest creature in the whole world is always a kid who’s been told to go back to his bed like a hundred times.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

It’s important to post stupid stuff so you can learn who likes you.

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Just took off my daytime sweatpants and put on my nighttime sweatpants.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

I love asking 5 different people for advice then doing what I want.

99 shares on Twitch this month:

Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

48 shares on Reddit this month:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Crossing things off my to-do list… I didn’t do them, I just don’t want them on my list anymore.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

His palm trees are Serengeti, destination wedding, luggage is heavy. There’s vomit on his tux already, Dollar store confetti.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

We got the Christmas tree yesterday, and now my wife knows that I was the chief architect working on the leaning tower of Pisa.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

That incredible ability of cats to only throw up on carpeted floors.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Just saw a piece of jewelry made in the 80s described as “vintage,” so I’ll be laying down the rest of the day.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry, being on social media gave you the impression I’m a social person.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,640

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

I feel for my kids, who had to take in the groceries and put them away today. They may never recover from this traumatic experience.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

I told my computer I needed a break, now it sends me reminders to stretch while I’m lying on the couch.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Reincarnation, in this economy?

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Good morning to life’s chaos, where my coffee is the only thing that makes sense!

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

You’re the human embodiment of an “ugh.”

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Ancient Egyptians used to worship cats and write on walls, a practice we still continue to do today on the Internet.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

America is like that TV show that’s been on for too long, and the writers don’t know what to do, so they just make anything happen.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

I thought my mixed signals were perfectly clear.

Making waves on Facebook:

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

Making waves on Discord:

Every night at bedtime I do one small ritual: six hours on my cell phone.

Live now on Pinterest:

I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the best thirst trap poster of them all?

Just landed via WeChat:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If history repeats itself, I’m getting a pet dinosaur.

Just shared via Slack:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Trending via Messenger:

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

Just shared via Telegram:

I need an emergency cheeseburger.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴