Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Growing old is a process of saying “it’s probably nothing,” with increasing frequency and increasingly being wrong.
  • Divorcing my wife to focus on my porn addiction.
  • My dog just looked me in the eye and said “no one is gonna believe you”, then took a nap.
  • Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.
  • I don’t wanna be dramatic but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.
  • The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.