Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Couples who finish each other’s sentences have killed before and will kill again.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

He called me delusional, but I think he meant delicious.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Therapy should be free and accessible because getting traumatized is free and accessible.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

It’s okay to love your job. Just know it doesn’t love you back.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

If I could have immunity to anything I would pick calories.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

The world would be a much nicer place if we just turn off the news.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

New year; new me. Just kidding. I’m already awesome.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

They were called “TV programs” because they were literally programming us, bro.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,707

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

I do not use AI, I use Reddit commenters’ opinions as fact because they are right.

Going viral on Reddit:

Imagine not sighing when you think about your life.

Just landed via Reddit:

I know this ain’t smart, but that never stopped me before.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

The trick is to be born in the right place and at the right time. If you mess that up, it gets tedious.

Spotted on Threads:

Twitter is basically like a mental institution where everyone thinks they’re the sane one, and everybody else is crazy.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

In six days God created heaven and earth. On the seventh day, in the interests of balance, the BBC interviewed Satan.

Going bananas on Reddit:

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Spotted on TikTok:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

We can’t use nicknames at work anymore, and I blame Teletubby.

Trending via Threads:

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you want to eat healthy but also party like a rockstar 🥗🍷🎉

bag, bag of salad, boxed, boxed wine, comparison, food, food comparison, humor, salad, vegetable, vegetables, wine

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love befriending yappers. They bring the yapping out of me. Then we yap together. Yapping is so much fun.

0

2 months ago

bring, chatter, communication, conversation, friendship, fun, i, love, me, much, socializing, talkative, talking, together, yapping
Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

0

2 months ago

care, dump, friendship, health, humor, invitation, mental, mental health, movie, nap, order, over, pizza, relaxation, self, self-care, take, trauma, trauma dump, want, watch
A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

0

2 months ago

chips, control, eating, eating chips, humor, increase, joke, real, relatable, smart, smart TV, snack, snack humor, technology, TV, TV joke, volume, volume control
The era where you dropped your phone and your battery flew out was just crazy.

0

2 months ago

accident, battery, crazy, drop, dropped, era, flew, funny moment, just, mishap, moment, phone, smartphone, smartphone accident, technology, technology mishap, where
Remember when we had to smack the TV cause it wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about too many people.

0

2 months ago

cause, clarity, coming, communication, feel, frustration, humor, i, nostalgia, people, remember, smack, technology, too, TV
Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

0

2 months ago

child, family, forever, humor, i, joke, know, parents, sarcasm, saying

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on Telegram this month:

Dentists get rich by staring into your mouth for 30 seconds, playing sinking ships with their assistant, and then telling you to brush better.

39 shares on X this month:

If the earth was flat, many people would have already jumped off it.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

My dad told my sister’s new boyfriend to stand at the end of the picture so he can crop him out whenever she dumps him.

29 shares on TikTok this month:

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I like to just appear out of nowhere and say, “this looks like a job for a binder clip.”

44 shares on WeChat this month:

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck got engaged, broke up, married other people, had children, reunited, got married, broke up again, and I’ve been single that whole time.

40 shares on Threads this month:

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

81 shares on Discord this month:

If I had a wife, I’d text her things like, ‘What’s your full name?’ and ‘When’s your birthday?’

72 shares on X this month:

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

91 shares on WhatsApp this month:

God’s plan for me is super weird so far.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Instagram should let you extend the run of one story for another 24 hours if the intended target didn’t see it.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Accidentally used men’s shower gel today, and I can already feel myself lying for no reason.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

If the earth was flat, cats would have pushed everything off it by now.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Waking up early is always beneficial. You just gotta make it past those first 10 minutes of being irritated.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

You ever notice how fans of the worst music always focus on the meanings of the songs instead of the actual music?

Trending via Threads:

That one British friend that’s too bloke.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

Trending via Instagram:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Shared recently on Messenger:

And for my next trick, I’ll set your soul on fire.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Had to sit with a straight face while my landlord told me I was paying his rent and mortgage for him.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Being Leonardo DiCaprio is like driving in a school zone. You don’t go above twenty-five.

Making waves on Reddit:

With certain people, you get nauseous just hearing their name.

Going viral on Instagram:

Sometimes the voices in my head get bullied by the voices in my stomach.

Trending via Instagram:

My age no longer permits me to suffer for love, so if you see me sad, it’s due to lack of money.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I love befriending yappers. They bring the yapping out of me. Then we yap together. Yapping is so much fun.

Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

The era where you dropped your phone and your battery flew out was just crazy.

Remember when we had to smack the TV cause it wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about too many people.

Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨