Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

When I was a kid, they played lame music for middle-aged people in the supermarket, but this morning at Whole Foods, it’s now all amazing bangers from my youth.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Goodnight Outlook, goodnight Teams, goodnight Zoom.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

Being annoying is the most beautiful thing a woman could be.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

“You never text back.” No, I be reading texts from the notification bar, then forget to text back.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,397

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Only here for the honeymoon phase, don’t show me your true colors.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

When you clean your room so well that the only trash left is you.

Breaking via Messenger:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

Making waves on Messenger:

I don’t like how monkeys have taken ownership of the whole banana thing. I bet I like bananas almost as much as they do.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I’ve taken a long, hard look at myself. I won’t be doing that again.

Shared recently on Messenger:

What do you mean a baguette isn’t a female bag?

Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

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Commentary:
"Who needs camping when you have a cozy mortgage to keep you sheltered and warm? 💁‍♂️🏡 #IndoorisLife"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on Discord this month:

The worst thing about wearing headphones is when you hallucinate people shouting you. Like, why does this happen?

53 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

52 shares on X this month:

Carrots are a great thing to eat when you’re hungry, and want to stay that way.

60 shares on Discord this month:

90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

41 shares on Twitch this month:

“In a galaxy far, far away” is starting to sound quite enticing.

51 shares on Telegram this month:

I am in favor of equal pay for men on OnlyFans.

17 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Canadians are nice because they’re close to Santa.

53 shares on X this month:

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

59 shares on Slack this month:

Ruining the Olympics for my fiancée by, every time they mention Paris, saying, “that’s where Ratatouille lived”.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

I miss when men had big hair, louder feelings, and leaned over cars to declare their love.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Hobbies include fake smiling while waiting for people to stop talking.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s like 10,000 lies when all you need is the files.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone’s a gangster until they turn a spoon the wrong way under running water.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

On today’s family vacation agenda: my parents read the internet out loud.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I made you snort laugh, so we’re going out, right?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Having no one to talk would get you a good sleeping schedule.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Spotify Wrapped isn’t enough, I want an Excel spreadsheet of my listening habits.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating a smart man, so I actually can turn my brain off when he is around.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,277

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Just got my steps in by avoiding someone I know.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I can trip over things that aren’t even there!

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

“Gravy is not a beverage.” Okay, well that’s why I was trying to drink it in the bathroom, so you wouldn’t see me.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

My playlist so bipolar. We either in love, depressed, or gang members.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

If you can figure out how to configure your default state to be slightly amused rather than slightly annoyed, you pretty much enter God Mode.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

This coffee is not coffeeing the way I need it to be coffeeing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Reddit:

Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

Spotted on Threads:

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

Trending via YouTube:

I’m old enough to remember when FIFA was about kicking balls, not sucking them.

Going viral on X:

I bet there’s a couple of seconds on that medieval torture stretcher rack where it feels incredible.

Breaking via Messenger:

I can clean the whole house if I want to, but if someone asks me to do it, suddenly I’m lazy.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Babe, what’s wrong? You’ve barely tweeted your manic thoughts today.

Spotted on Twitch:

Genuinely, why does the logo of every AI chatbot look like a butthole?

Seen just now on Instagram:

Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Remember when downloading a song in under 5 minutes was considered progress?

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I forgot how weird November is. There’s no afternoon; it’s just night after 3 p.m.

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