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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Can we take a moment to celebrate the little ride we get in the pneumatic chair at the hair salon or barber when they pump it up or down?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Apple, who gives you permission to turn the brightness down again when I’ve just turned it up?

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Social media has given everyone a chance to be heard, and it was a gigantic mistake.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

I’m ugly but I can make u laugh.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,737

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

Just shared via Discord:

I come from a family of failed magicians. I have two half sisters.

Going viral on TikTok:

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

Seen just now on Twitch:

A job interview is basically a conversation between two liars.

Spotted on YouTube:

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Twitter is great because you can get good life advice from other emotionally unstable adults.

Death by a thousand stupid questions.

4 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like a slow day at the office! 😂🙄📚

death, exaggeration, frustration, humor, question, questions, sarcasm, stupid

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

1 month ago
done, enough, humor, i, movie, movie night, night, not enough, popcorn, quantity, regret, snack
My favourite thing about waking up at ridiculous o’clock is the solitude.

3 months ago
early, early morning, favorite, favorite thing, favourite, morning, morning routine, ridiculous, routine, sleep, solitude, thing, waking, waking up
My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

1 month ago
communication, distraction, eyes, hearing, humor, i, listening, not hearing, right, single, superpower, talking, word
Can we not just call it Zealand now?

1 month ago
call, humor, just, suggestion, wordplay, Zealand
I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

2 months ago
confidence, humor, i, need, new, new year, perfect, resolution, self-esteem, year
Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

1 month ago
addiction, caffeine, chew, coffee, energy, enough, humor, i, line, need, power, power line

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

I did some soul searching last night. I’m happy to report I still have one.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Just bought 4 pounds of cherries like I’m in some math problem.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

“You’ve changed.” Yeah, I watched a new movie.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I love to sleep, I wish I could get paid to sleep.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

You can tell it’s desperate times the way spam messages have gone from fantasies like ‘I am a prince and I want to give you money’ to ‘I am an HR manager and I have a real job for you!’

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer the term selective participation.

Just shared via Instagram:

I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.

Trending via YouTube:

Girls won’t admit it, but they don’t like super fine dudes; they like medium ugly, funny dudes that dress nice.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

Live now on Telegram:

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I heard time is money, so I quit my job. Now I have lots of time!

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Death by a thousand stupid questions.

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

My favourite thing about waking up at ridiculous o’clock is the solitude.

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

Can we not just call it Zealand now?

I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Your ex is probably in a relationship, thinking about you.

Note to self: No more bitching about ugly furniture with people at IKEA whose home you haven’t been to yet.

The sexiest thing a man can do is have a problem-solving mentality.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

Taylor Swift’s prenup is about to be longer than any book Travis Kelce has ever read.

Drugs and alcohol take years off your life and give them to Keith Richards.

One day you’re young and fun, and the next you’re saying, “I wonder how old this tree is.”

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Ouija boards are like unannounced phone calls for ghosts.

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

I nearly broke my toe because the coffee table didn’t look where it was going.

A thing I never realized about being an adult is that you will always be cleaning your kitchen. No matter if you get takeout, no matter if you’re gone all day, you will be cleaning the kitchen.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I’m so smart, I got rid of cable and now I only have $638 in monthly streaming services.

Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

I hope this email kills us both.

I trust an insult more than I do a compliment.

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Death by a thousand stupid questions.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

My favourite thing about waking up at ridiculous o’clock is the solitude.

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

Can we not just call it Zealand now?

I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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