Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

I have had songs stuck in my head and I have had people stuck in my head, I highly recommend songs.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Some days you have breakfast for dinner and live life on your own terms.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

We’ve had far more storms since we started naming them. We’re giving them the attention they crave. Just call it needy wind.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Tried online dating, and it turns out my soulmate is a Nigerian prince who needs my bank details to escape his kingdom.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,608

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

I used to party all night. Now I check the weather forecast for the next day to see if it’s a good laundry day.

Seen just now on X:

I now feel I’ve watched enough reruns of The Shawshank Redemption on basic cable that I’ll be able to successfully make it in prison.

Shared recently on TikTok:

What’s wrong, babe? You’ve hardly touched my mixed signals.

Spotted on YouTube:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

Spotted on TikTok:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Breaking via Threads:

I get easily confused in the morning. Also in the afternoon and evening.

Making waves on X:

My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

Breaking via YouTube:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

Making waves on Discord:

Sneaking up behind people and marrying them.

Making waves on Slack:

Make your salad taste better by putting it between bread, meat, cheese, and Big Mac sauce.

Did you seriously just pique my interest?

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
My interest is now piqued, and just like my eyebrows, it's staying raised! 🤨😂

curiosity, expression, humor, interest, just, phrase, sarcasm, seriously, surprise

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I don’t mind being the villain in your story because you’re a clown in mine.

0

2 months ago

being, clown, comedy, conflict, humor, i, irony, mind, mine, perspective, relationship, story, villain
I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

0

2 months ago

activity, area, beach, coastal, coastal area, envy, fun, fun activity, jealousy, just, lifestyle, live, mean, people, random, random Tuesday, Tuesday
To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

0

2 months ago

gratitude, guy, humor, inventor, joke, math, nothing, thanks, zero
I’ve heard so much about the “Eye of the Tiger,” but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters?

0

2 months ago

ever, eye, four, humor, joke, letter, letters, much, tiger, wordplay
As someone who lives on earth, rising sea levels are alarming. But as someone who has always wanted to be a mermaid, I’m intrigued.

0

2 months ago

alarm, always, concern, Earth, environmental, environmental concern, fantasy, humor, intrigue, level, mermaid, ocean, sea, sea level, someone, wanted
Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

0

3 months ago

after, evening, finish, meal, morning, night, relaxation, routine, show, sleep, time, tomorrow, too, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

44 shares on Threads this month:

Have a good weekend, unless you have other plans.

88 shares on Reddit this month:

New year; new me. Just kidding. I’m already awesome.

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m basically the human version of tangled up Christmas lights.

36 shares on Facebook this month:

Thank you two-step authentication codes that expire after 60 seconds for providing Mission Impossible-type drama into my mundane suburban existence.

77 shares on TikTok this month:

Good things happen when you smile or when you’re naked.

57 shares on YouTube this month:

When life gives you lemons, take the lemons. They were a gift. Maybe life thought you liked lemons. Did you think about that? No, you’re always thinking about yourself.

22 shares on Discord this month:

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

30 shares on YouTube this month:

I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”

50 shares on Facebook this month:

You should introduce your upper lip to your bottom lip sometime and shut up.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Did you guys hear about the “internet”? Apparently, you can say literally anything there.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

Discovered a new coping mechanism called lashing out and making your loved ones resent you.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

It’s a good thing that not everyone has a smartphone. We also need people who honk when the lights turn green.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Fyi, if you like listening to “rain sounds,” they’re almost all recordings of chicken being fried.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I love when the restaurant bathroom has different music playing than the restaurant. It’s like I’m going to Club Pee Pee.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

My bra isn’t just padded — it’s also filled with cookie and chip crumbs.

Just shared via X:

The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

Seen just now on YouTube:

If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.

Just shared via Reddit:

If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Seen just now on TikTok:

The most dangerous part of your 50s is those first few steps after prolonged sitting.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

Shared recently on Facebook:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Your car antlers tell me everything I need to know about you.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Maybe the problem is that I’m cooler than any man I’ve ever met.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Did you seriously just pique my interest?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I don’t mind being the villain in your story because you’re a clown in mine.

I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

I’ve heard so much about the “Eye of the Tiger,” but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters?

As someone who lives on earth, rising sea levels are alarming. But as someone who has always wanted to be a mermaid, I’m intrigued.

Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨