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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡จ has bookmarked:

โ€œYouโ€™re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ซ has copied:

The book characters may be fictional, but my emotional instability over them is real.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡น has viewed:

Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡พ has shared:

Another day on this hamster wheel to nowhere.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡จ has viewed:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฑ has downloaded:

Before marriage, I would sit at a stoplight for hours because I had no one to tell me the light had changed to green.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡พ has downloaded:

Telling men I have a boyfriend doesnโ€™t chase them away anymore, so Iโ€™ve started telling them I have a child.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has bookmarked:

Please no more relationships that are supposed to be a lesson. I’m already quite the scholar.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,594

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Live now on Slack:

Itโ€™s not the destination that matters. Itโ€™s the snacks you eat on the way.

Going viral on Telegram:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

Just shared via Slack:

30s: Oh look, a dance floor! 50s: Oh look, a couch!

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

Trending via Pinterest:

I donโ€™t post for money or fame, I post because thereโ€™s something seriously wrong with me.

Shared recently on Discord:

They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.

Trending via Messenger:

A murder on the dance floor would explain the panic! at the disco.

Spotted on Telegram:

There should be an opposite of Valentineโ€™s Day where you post Instagram photos of your enemy.

Live now on Threads:

Threatening my wife with a tariff every time she makes fun of me.

Just shared via Threads:

I’m not always a couch potato. For instance, right now I’m a chair potato, and later I’ll be a bed potato.

Everyday I wait for a vampire to seduce me.

Funny quote about waiting for a vampire's seduction in a playful, witty tone.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
Still waiting with my garlic-flavored breath mints! ๐Ÿง›โ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿง„๐Ÿคฃ

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Social Media Stars โญ

53 shares on YouTube this month:

Not leaving the house and not having contact with other people. The punishments of my childhood are now my hobbies.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

The sexiest thing a man can do is have a problem-solving mentality.

66 shares on YouTube this month:

I wonder if this next thunderstorm is thinking of me, too.

14 shares on Pinterest this month:

If thereโ€™s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesnโ€™t start while Iโ€™m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

36 shares on Discord this month:

When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

91 shares on Discord this month:

I canโ€™t be the only one who screenshots confirmations, even though youโ€™ll get an email and text.

16 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

90 shares on Slack this month:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

51 shares on Telegram this month:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

37 shares on Threads this month:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

13 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

9 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Working on my harmonica skills so those around me can both hear and feel my depression.

6 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

“Gravy is not a beverage.” Okay, well that’s why I was trying to drink it in the bathroom, so you wouldn’t see me.

16 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

โ€œIโ€™m not falling for that again,โ€ I say, as Iโ€™m about to fall for whatever that is again.

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My reality check bounced, guess Iโ€™ll have to stay insane for the time being.

19 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Every morning, the cat watches me make coffee and asks if we can go sit out on the balcony to watch the birds, and every morning I say, yes, of course, letโ€™s.

13 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

21 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

6 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

The laundromat should give you XP and ranks like โ€œSlimelordโ€ and โ€œGlunkfather,โ€ based on how dirty your clothes are.

19 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Scooby-Doo led me to believe that if I were ever really scared, I should run super-fast in place.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,540

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฉ has shared:

Donโ€™t ask me why, but the older you get, the more you love coffee.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ซ has viewed:

Why do boys never buy the Pro Max iPhones? I swear it’s only girls with big phones.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has shared:

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighborโ€™s backyard.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has downloaded:

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

The cold water does not get warmer if you jump late.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ณ has shared:

I believe libraries are our proof that we once valued curiosity.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

No, I wonโ€™t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

Some parents are blessed with amazing kids and others have kids that decide to learn the trumpet.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has copied:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡พ has copied:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Seen just now on Discord:

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

Trending via Discord:

My favorite type of gender reveal is the one where they just tell me and I don’t have to go to a party to find out.

Breaking via Twitch:

Way too many low IQ conspiracy theories floating around. Give me high IQ conspiracy theories.

Trending via Threads:

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

Making waves on Discord:

Asserting dominance by starting all my private DMs with “I hope this DM finds you well.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Iโ€™m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

Spotted on Slack:

Give yourself time to heal. A couple of decades should do it.

Trending via Pinterest:

Love how Batman: The Animated Series seems to take place in the 40s and the 50s and the 70s and the 90s all at once.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Kids be like: โ€œNice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.โ€

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

ยฉ 2026. All rights reserved.

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