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Commentary:
"Who needs a significant other when you can have friends with muffin-tary benefits? 🧁🥐😄 Let them whisk away your problems with their yummy creations! #BakeItTilYouMakeIt"

baked, baked good, benefits, delicious, dessert, food, friends, friendship, good, goods, humor, just, relationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

0

2 months ago

before, buy, estate, experience, funny idea, ghost, haunted, haunted house, home, house, humor, idea, just, let, night, real, real estate, rent, should, spend, sure
If I ever went to jail for murder, it would be for murdering my printer.

0

2 months ago

crime, ever, frustration, humor, i, jail, murder, printer, technology
“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

0

4 weeks ago

apple, Apple Music, called, consumerism, disgusted, ethical, ethical consumerism, fair, fair trade, humor, i, mom-and-pop, music, music platform, platform, sarcasm, service, Spotify, still, streaming, streaming service, trade
In an alternate universe, sex dreams of me.

0

2 months ago

alternate, alternate universe, dreams, fantasy, humor, imagination, me, sex, universe
Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

0

2 months ago

dad, excitement, exciting, golf, humor, irony, Masters, napping, sports
If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

0

2 months ago

followers, humor, i, ID, media, popularity, social, social media, too, transformation, turn, water, wine

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Discord this month:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

35 shares on Slack this month:

If I was a little smarter, I’d be aware of how stupid I am.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

12 shares on Instagram this month:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

67 shares on X this month:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

74 shares on Telegram this month:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

17 shares on Messenger this month:

Too young to retire, too poor to quit and too fat to strip – so let’s move on.

20 shares on Instagram this month:

I don’t need a recipe for disaster. I usually just eyeball it.

67 shares on Snapchat this month:

Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Have your guardian angel call my guardian angel.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

When I bark at a dog, I always worry that I might have inadvertently said something wrong.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Even before the internet, I always had a little side chat going on in my head.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink twice a year. When it’s sunny, and when it isn’t.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

There’s nothing I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

How is every author the #1 New York Times bestseller?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I didn’t want to go to work tomorrow morning.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

I put the “pro” in procrastinate.

Shared recently on YouTube:

My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Me and my boys are broke, so we take turns taking pictures of one iced matcha.

Just shared via Messenger:

I have noticed something quite worrying: after I buy more things I have less money.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

Seen just now on Facebook:

You’re my least favourite notification.

Seen just now on Threads:

My ego is bruised so I’m going to ice it with some cold beer.

Shared recently on Discord:

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Friends with benefits, but it’s just that they make delicious baked goods.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

If I ever went to jail for murder, it would be for murdering my printer.

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

In an alternate universe, sex dreams of me.

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨