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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

“Why do I feel like shit all the time?” I ask myself, while staring into the flashlight that tells me bad news.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Dear music, thanks!

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Being social sucks all my energy.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Many people mistakenly believe that diamond is the hardest substance on earth, but in reality it is my husband’s stubborn head.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? Here, but fatter.

Trending via Messenger:

I’m so old that when I take a walk down memory lane, I get lost.

Trending via Pinterest:

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

Shared recently on Threads:

December turns me into someone who believes a fat man with a beard can fix everything.

Spotted on Messenger:

Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

Trending via Slack:

The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Live now on Discord:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Also shame on you. Stop foolin’ me, I am pure.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

There’s just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

“The engine light is on!” Yeah, that means it’s working.

Funny 3D printing quotes

New funny 3D printing quotes 👇

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

4 weeks ago

3d, 3D printing, apology, aviation, delay, flight, flight delay, fuselage, humor, just, little, maintenance, printing, time, waiting

All funny 3D printing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on WeChat this month:

The year number is getting too big, let’s do another Jesus soon.

40 shares on TikTok this month:

Using Twitter as a semi-vague posting journal for memory purposes.

77 shares on Threads this month:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

53 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Most people think that I’m arrogant, but who cares what peasants think.

74 shares on Instagram this month:

That looks like a problem for someone else.

12 shares on WhatsApp this month:

While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

38 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you turn your phone off for 1 day, you’ll realize it’s still 2007 outside.

65 shares on Slack this month:

My five-year plan is to just see what happens.

43 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The best way to use Twitter will forever be as an observer.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Don’t understand why electricians aren’t called power rangers, but okay.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Maybe you should embark on a strange journey.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Of course I intermittently fast. That’s when I sleep.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

My kidnappers sent me back early with a full apology, some money, and several of their fingers.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Before Facebook, we would hold people hostage inside our homes by showing them photo albums of our vacation.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Everything is about sex except Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is about power.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Just shared via Twitch:

He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.

Just shared via YouTube:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Shared recently on Instagram:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m at my most math when I solve a problem while creating three new ones.

Just shared via Instagram:

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

Spotted on Twitch:

My wife is napping quietly and the villain of this story is about to be this sneeze.

Breaking via Reddit:

Babe, you’re not acting according to my delusions right now.

Shared recently on Messenger:

What are cats even trying to do?

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

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Funny 3D printing quotes

New funny 3D printing quotes 👇

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

All funny 3D printing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨