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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Let’s draft everyone who has their phone on military time first, since you’re all so eager.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

You’re not entertaining, you are exittaining.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Working on my harmonica skills so those around me can both hear and feel my depression.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Not to brag but there are so many movies out there that have watched me sleep.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

People out there having five-year plans, and here I am waking up just hoping I remember what day it is.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Girls want a bad boy to fix. Boys want a good girl to corrupt. Me? I just want a rumbustious monkey as a butler.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Has anybody else completely lost it or is it just me and Kanye?

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1815 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,977

Funny Quotes Topics

14,782

Funny Quotes Images

11,977

Updated

5 seconds ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Freshly posted on Slack:

Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Not a religious man but I do say a short prayer whenever I open a gas station restroom door.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

A fun thing to do at work is call in sick and stay home.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Any cults got something wild planned anytime soon? I’m trying to find the good estate sales.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

One of my biggest fears during a zombie apocalypse is having to sleep without a fan.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

That awkward moment when someone is doing the dishes, and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

You don’t realize how incorrect and annoying YouTube video essays are until they’re about something you like.

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Funny classics quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1815 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,977

Funny Quotes Topics

14,782

Funny Quotes Images

11,977

Updated

5 seconds ago

Users Online

3,438

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Remember: no matter what anyone else thinks of you, it’s how you delude yourself that matters.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Grown men asking Grok if this is real.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

I nearly broke my toe because the coffee table didn’t look where it was going.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Stay humble, you are someone’s weird coworker.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

If we “talk,” you ain’t single. We’re in a pending relationship. You’re in the cart.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

I’m not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

I just realized boobytrap backwards spells partyboob.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

There’s a rhyming Italian expression for saying “take it or leave it” that goes “o mangi questa minestra o salti dalla finestra”. It means “either eat this soup or throw yourself out the window”.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Bands are always like “here’s another song”. Yeah, no shit, that’s pretty much all you do.

Live now on Messenger:

It’s like my therapist always says, that’ll be $175.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

If I had my Pinterest wardrobe, I would be unstoppable.

Seen just now on Discord:

Are you really a personal trainer or do you just want to wear shorts to work every day?

Just landed via Telegram:

“I’m not ordering fries, I’ll just eat some of yours!” -Former friends of mine

Just shared via TikTok:

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

Spotted on Instagram:

Pressure washing is like regular washing but with a lot of yelling and tight deadlines.

Reported on X:

Venmo is my favorite social media site. I love to see my boy John charge his wife for Martinis.

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