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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

What if they close grocery stores and we have to hunt for our food? I don’t even know where the little gummy bears live.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

When you have bad handwriting, notes to yourself are just fun little mysteries you get to solve later on.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Airports should have tattoo parlors for those of us with long layovers and poor impulse control.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Some call it flirting… I call it just being extra nice to someone who is extra attractive…

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I will never trust a cake transport box enough to just hold it by the handle.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Forget tagging friends, I want to be able to tag my enemies.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Millennials aren’t having kids because no one’s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

Updated

18 minutes ago

Users Online

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Threads:

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

Spotted on Discord:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Going through life with a signature I invented as a teenager.

Just landed via Snapchat:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Just shared via Instagram:

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed over their chest because of the belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

Just shared via TikTok:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I should have been a Librarian, my favorite thing to do is telling people to shut up.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Love is like a bird. Sometimes flying around me but then moving on.

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Funny donating quotes

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All funny donating quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

Updated

18 minutes ago

Users Online

3,420

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

How do you tell someone that you will probably end up marrying them, but in a casual way?

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

I don’t always clear my calculator, but when I do, I hit both C and CE a bunch of times because I don’t know exactly what they do.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

The first person to see a peacock spread his tail probably had a heart attack.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Never signed up for a 401k cause there’s no way in hell I can run that far.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

My guardian angel is taking the longest smoking break in recorded history.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

To whoever stole my oversized clock, you owe me big time.

Just landed via WeChat:

The urge to pee in the morning is so aggressive. Bro, like, chill we’re getting there. Don’t threaten to come out.

Just shared via Pinterest:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Just shared via X:

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Trending via Slack:

There should be a variant of fencing with two guys trying to kiss one another.

Shared recently on Twitch:

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Socks teach us that being made for each other does not mean being together.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Just shared via Messenger:

Yes, I’ve gained weight. Too many people wanted to have sex with me. It was annoying.

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