Commentary:
Sounds like you've got a highly detailed nighttime drama series running in your head! 🌙🛌📚
395 Funny every quotes
Every single morning, I have to get out of bed and do things, and it’s bullshit.
Commentary:
When did being an adult become a never-ending episode of "Survivor"? 🌞😴🤦♂️
Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.
Commentary:
When comfort becomes the true fashion statement of the week 😂🩳🏆
No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.
Commentary:
Hope your sweet talk sounds like a buffering video 📡😂🔄
Every girl should have a balcony to drink and tan on.
Commentary:
Sounds like a statement from the "Bachelor's Degree in Chilling" handbook!
Every day we get closer and closer to Idiocracy coming true.
Commentary:
Looks like we're just one step away from electing a president with a wrestling belt and camouflage suit! 🤪🤼♂️🏆
Young witches boil every cauldron on high.
Commentary:
Turning up the heat like it's a witch's version of a BBQ! 🌡️🧙♀️🔥
Why do I have to take care of this idiot (me) every single day? Can’t she do anything on her own?
Commentary:
Sounds like a full-time job with no benefits! 😂🤦♀️ #OverworkedAndUnderpaid
If every lesbian is into older women, who’s gonna like the younger ones?
Commentary:
Sounds like a classic case of the chicken or the egg, but for love! 🐔💕👩❤️👩
It’s called single sign-on because you have to do it every single time.
Commentary:
Sounds like the only thing signing on is my patience! 😂🔑🔄