Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

There’s no-one who can get more drunk on power than the admin of a village Facebook group.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

A fun thing to do at work is call in sick and stay home.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

My body’s check engine light has been on for years.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

People watching you so close, you’d think you were a Netflix series.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Managed to empty the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something there takes on a life of its own.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Kinda sucks that the prize for washing your laundry is getting to fold your laundry.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

My couch better stop looking at me like that, it knows exactly what it’s doing.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Customers will say shit like, “Uhh, it’s asking me to remove my card?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,409

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

In contrast to the ship, the movie Titanic was quite well received in America.

Trending via Facebook:

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

Seen just now on Discord:

I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

Just landed via Facebook:

If you don’t have a favorite spatula yet, you still have some growing up to do.

Making waves on WeChat:

Two things I learned yesterday: I’m not too old to sit in a beanbag chair, but I’m too old to get out of one.

Live now on Messenger:

Social media is a great way to make new enemies.

Shared recently on Threads:

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Just landed via Facebook:

Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!

Spotted on Twitch:

I don’t care if my parents are disappointed in me, I’m not impressed by them either.

Funny exorcism quotes

Funny exorcism quotes 👻 bring a hilarious twist to spooky stories and ghostly encounters! Whether you’re a believer or just love a good laugh, these witty lines will have you smiling through the scares 😄🎃. Perfect for lightening the mood during eerie moments or sharing with friends who enjoy the supernatural with a side of humor! Ready to laugh at the paranormal? Let’s dive into some spooky fun! 🕯️👹

New funny exorcism quotes 👇

All funny exorcism quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on X this month:

The world is my oyster and I’m allergic to shellfish.

80 shares on YouTube this month:

Please don’t celebrate April Fool’s day if you’re not a fool. My culture is not your costume.

72 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’ve got to start taking better care of myself. Tomorrow I’ll walk to the liquor store.

31 shares on TikTok this month:

Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

45 shares on Reddit this month:

Me, aged 20: This is internship summer. I will get an internship. I will find a job. I will study. I will read. I will learn piano. I will… Me, nowadays: This summer, I’m going to try all of the ice cream flavors.

81 shares on Slack this month:

Asian girl at tech company: Wow, everyone here is so friendly.

86 shares on X this month:

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

23 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You’re telling me this moron’s on oxy.

99 shares on YouTube this month:

I’ll be honest. I can’t solve your problems. What I can do is create new, bigger problems that will make your current problems seem quaint by comparison.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Dua Lipa is a fantastic singer AND Mario’s advice to Luigi when he wants to get on a slightly higher platform.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

When I write “I hope this email finds you well” I’m referring to the email’s skills in tracking you down.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m going to get more sleep tonight” is always the first lie I tell myself in the morning.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I admire how time manages to quickly heal wounds but takes forever to remove awkward tan lines.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I still make time for all my favorite hobbies, like drinking, swearing, and making people feel uncomfortable.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,297

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Twitter sucks so much, but randomly there are such funny tweets, so I wait, like a frog, for one delicious fly.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Suffering from a forehead kisses deficiency (self-diagnosed).

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Hey, I came over because the grass seemed really green here, but now that I’m looking back that grass actually looks crazy green, so I’m gonna go.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I’m old enough to remember when FIFA was about kicking balls, not sucking them.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

If you’re looking for a quiet place to talk to yourself, my DMs are open.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

A wise man once said, “Bees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.”

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

It’s time I admit something: Sometimes, when I say good night, I don’t actually go to bed right away.

Trending via Slack:

Whoever invented the gender reveal party needs to be launched into the sun.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

A lot of childhood characters weren’t so much beloved as there wasn’t anything else on the TV.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

Shared recently on Discord:

I worry a lot about the wild animals in my neighborhood, but I’m beginning to think they don’t worry about me.

Trending via Snapchat:

Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Fundamentally, I understand chess, because I too would never let my king feel unsafe.

Just shared via Messenger:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴