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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Tattoos: because being an adult is hard, and I deserve to have stickers.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m not even doomscrolling anymore, I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

The dude who invented the autocorrect has died. Restaurant in piece.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Why did they call it painting your toenails and not graffeeti?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

People pass a joint around like it’s no big deal, but the minute I ask someone to do that with their Subway sandwich, I’m a weirdo.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I may as well go while I’m here.”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

I had zero respect for my boss until he started appearing exclusively by hologram.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

“What’s a random act of kindness you’ve done for a stranger recently?” I helped a bunch of teens buy alcohol and cigarettes the other day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

29 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

$20k in my bank account. – The k is silent.

Spotted on WeChat:

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

Trending via WeChat:

I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

Spotted on Messenger:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

Seen just now on Messenger:

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

Going viral on WeChat:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Seen just now on Threads:

I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Tinder is a food delivery app if you’re good at it.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I’ve cooked for men I should have poisoned, so yeah, I do have self-control.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

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Funny expensive clothing quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

29 minutes ago

Users Online

3,461

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

I’m not sure how long my body can handle this “getting out of bed early in the morning” nonsense.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

My retirement plan is time travel to the 80s.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

Don’t invite me if there’s nowhere to sit down.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Isn’t it odd that “read” is pronounced like “lead”, while “read” is pronounced like “lead”?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

The ’90s were a time of blissful ignorance where we expected rock stars to sleep with groupies.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

The only thing I know about AI is, it desperately wants us to have more fingers.

Just landed via Facebook:

I’m thinking of maybe killing off a few characters in the book I’m writing. That will really spice up my autobiography.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

Going viral on Discord:

We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

“This would be better if there was cake” really does ring true in any situation.

Seen just now on Telegram:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

Trending via Discord:

With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

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