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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

How many of you also constantly take screenshots of something and then never look at them again?

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

How many exercise videos do you have to buy before you get some results?

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Waitress: “Do you have any questions about the menu?” Me: “What kind of font is this?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2251 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,413

Funny Quotes Topics

15,120

Funny Quotes Images

12,413

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

“Autism didn’t exist until recently!” Have you met old guys who work in hardware stores?

Shared recently on Discord:

Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

Just shared via Slack:

No, babe, I love your prefrontal cortex. The fully developed ones scare me.

Making waves on Telegram:

Humans can accomplish so much, unless it’s parking at a shopping center during the holidays.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

Trending via X:

Imagine hearing the ice cream truck music, but at night.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Good morning everyone, who feels like working today? I promise I’ll let you do my job.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication dating day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2251 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,413

Funny Quotes Topics

15,120

Funny Quotes Images

12,413

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,433

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

The class: “You want us to do what?” Super Mario: “Jump around, catch and eat the giant mushroom, bang your head against the crates and, if necessary, crush all the critters. It’sa easy!”

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I ordered one of those Tempura mattresses. Way too crunchy.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Party rock is in the mouse tonighttt, piece of cheese I’m gonna take a big biteee.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Amazing if accurate: bleeding money.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on YouTube:

“Age is just a number!” Yeah, the older I get, the number I feel.

Just landed via Threads:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

Reported on Messenger:

I wish people knew how good I can sing when I’m alone in my car and in my shower.

Just landed via Threads:

My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I’m camping, I won’t be covered.

Breaking via Slack:

It’s not about the cards you’re dealt, but how you play the hand you’ve got hidden up your sleeve.

Just landed via YouTube:

Men used to smoke Marlboros. Now they cry when they lose their strawberry cheesecake vape.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

Just landed via WeChat:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

Spotted on Twitch:

Sometimes a girl has to delete all the apps on her phone and not speak to anyone for a week to find true happiness.

Just shared via Twitch:

Weddings should have a worst man.

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