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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Social media is proof that even mental hospitals have WiFi.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I can sing all the words to the intro song of DuckTales, what’s your flex?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Not sure why I drink anymore. I get the same effect from standing up too fast.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

If you sweat while you eat, it should count as a workout.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

I’ve been in a bad mood since like 2010.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

I’m going to get some steel wool so I can crochet myself a new car.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Quitting my job to rock around the Christmas tree.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2251 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,413

Funny Quotes Topics

15,120

Funny Quotes Images

12,413

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

God, I was so happy when I was 18. I wasn’t at the time, but in retrospect I was.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Breaking via Twitch:

I’m not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My coffee and I used to be hot. Now, we’re just bitter.

Trending via Twitch:

The cool thing about Twitter is you’re never the craziest one.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

That uncle or aunt who kept their distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense as you get older.

Just shared via Telegram:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

Reported on LinkedIn:

In my house the roles are reversed cause my kids tell me to turn my music down.

Going viral on Telegram:

This book ain’t got no pictures.

Trending via Snapchat:

Bon Jovi must be at least 3/4 of the way there by now.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication dating day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2251 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,413

Funny Quotes Topics

15,120

Funny Quotes Images

12,413

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,458

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

White, black, yellow, brown, Democrat, Republican, man, woman, straight, gay, transgender, Jew, Christian, Muslim, young and old — you will all taste the same to the zombies.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

You know you’re an introvert when you want to go home before even leaving the house.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

They should make you watch a training video and pass a little test before you’re allowed to touch the office coffee maker.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I bet she doesn’t even laugh at your dumb jokes the fake way I did.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Most people who have found themselves are amazed to discover that there is nothing there at all.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Offering someone food, and secretly hoping, they don’t want it.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

A blind guy felt my face and said, “Wonderful.”

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

Seen just now on Snapchat:

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

In Star Wars, anyone can hop in any spaceship and knows how to fly it. I just spent 20 minutes trying to find the headlights in a rental car.

Making waves on Threads:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating all the sweets myself.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Shared recently on X:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Shared recently on X:

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth 2300 words.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Human hibernation should be a thing.

Just landed via Discord:

Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

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