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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

“I’m currently not accepting new items on my to-do list.”

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Don’t hate me because I can fall asleep within seconds; hate me because I can sleep through the night without having to get up to go to the bathroom.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

These quiet electric cars are really annoying. I have to stop scrolling and look up while walking outside now.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Steve Jobs was a vibe coder. He just prompted Steve Wozniak.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

They should send the Epstein list to everyone’s phones like that U2 album.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Roses are red, violets are blue, sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic, but no, this is just gardening facts.

Trending via Instagram:

Just broke a clothes hanger and now have seven years of bad outfits.

Reported on Pinterest:

Life would be so much easier if the nose of people who lie all the time did actually grow longer like Pinocchio’s.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Imagine if spiders giggled when they ran away from us.

Spotted on Telegram:

That one friend who has a dangerously loose grasp on food safety.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Sometimes, I feel like I need love, but the moment I finish eating, I realize I was just hungry.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.

Going viral on YouTube:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Spotted on Threads:

Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

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Funny gold star quotes

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All funny gold star quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

I actually think it’s quite beautiful that you have to be the one to save yourself.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

I’m really good at compromising as long as I get my way.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

If you ever find yourself mad at me, put a cape on so you can be super mad.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

There should be a tented fingers emoji. For when you’re feeling ruminative.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Went to the toilet today without my cell phone. There are 245 tiles.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Spotify wrapped is like my annual mental health report and it’s getting worse by each passing year.

Seen just now on Slack:

Why can’t more dumb people be shy?

Just shared via Instagram:

Hey, so this Mercury retrograde is actually really demonic and soul-crippling. Let’s wrap this up by midnight.

Reported on Twitch:

We don’t make people walk the plank like we used to.

Spotted on Facebook:

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Whenever I get up my cat gets up too and then yells at me like it’s my fault she decided we have to do this together.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.

Trending via Discord:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

Reported on Discord:

People don’t have demonically glowing red eyes in photographs like they used to.

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