Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

There are only two kinds of people, and I avoid them both.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Ladies, repeat after me: “I was wrong and I am sorry!”

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

If you turn your phone off for 1 day, you’ll realize it’s still 2007 outside.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

I bet once Bigfoot tries cheeseburgers, he’s gonna wanna hangout with us all the time.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Years of personal growth can be unraveled in 2 days at your parents’ house.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

My daughter says I’m making it up! Do you remember having to carry a quarter for the payphone, just in case?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

I don’t need a maid. I just need someone to tell me once a week that they’re coming to visit, and I’ll panic-clean my entire house in less than an hour.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

You miss 100% of the gossip from the phone calls you don’t answer.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Sorry about all the mean stuff I said when I was right.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

I like listening to podcasts because it’s basically getting to enjoy a conversation without having to participate in it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,584

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

Is it too late to reset my life back to factory settings?

Trending via Slack:

I only buy cookware with the handles that somehow get hotter than the pot itself.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Sex is cool, but have you ever received reassurance without asking for it?

Making waves on WeChat:

Don’t wait for later to eat the cake. Do it now, before another mammal of your household finds it.

Trending via Reddit:

If they stole your post, they probably need it more than you do.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I don’t have a favourite person, but I do have a favourite cheese.

Shared recently on Telegram:

“My family doesn’t have a black sheep,” I say, while everyone avoids eye contact.

Making waves on TikTok:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Going viral on Messenger:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Funny lava lamp quotes

New funny lava lamp quotes 👇

All funny lava lamp quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on Reddit this month:

Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

56 shares on X this month:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

14 shares on Threads this month:

Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

67 shares on Messenger this month:

When I was a kid, they played lame music for middle-aged people in the supermarket, but this morning at Whole Foods, it’s now all amazing bangers from my youth.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am.

59 shares on Telegram this month:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

83 shares on Facebook this month:

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

10 shares on YouTube this month:

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

People make the mistake of keeping aubergines in the fridge, when in fact they should be kept in the bin.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Dudes get a MacBook, and all of a sudden, they got work to do in public places.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Spotify Wrapped: February was your basketball watermelon loudspeaker phone call hip hop moment.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

22 folks are currently checking 👀

How do I tell the mosquitoes that I don’t consent?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve got 50 minutes to make it look like I’ve been flossing for the last 6 months.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Feeling feral. Better make some mac and cheese.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is just a diary I choose to show to strangers.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,532

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Be nice to me, I may be hot one day.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

Life begins when you can afford it.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

You ever notice how fans of the worst music always focus on the meanings of the songs instead of the actual music?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

People my age are doing so much, and I’m just at home reliving the same day over and over again.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Okay, seen enough, someone put a blanket over my cage.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Sometimes I feel like I’m cheating on my recliner with my loveseat, in case you were wondering how emotionally invested I am in laziness.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

I’m an adult, that’s why I can have Skittles for dinner.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I don’t need a psychic to tell me which planets make me sad. It’s earth.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Discord:

Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Seen just now on Messenger:

The final act of love is not texting them happy birthday.

Trending via Discord:

I’m not being mean. I’m just too old to pretend to like you.

Going viral on Facebook:

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Satan: “Would you please stop sacrificing animals to me. I’m not running a zoo down here.”

Going viral on Pinterest:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Breaking via TikTok:

The day after Christmas is a dangerous morning to be a microwave.

Spotted on X:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I’m having a bad day. Please send super-cute pics of your credit cards to cheer me up.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴