234 funny little quotes - Page 6 - Wordgag

Can we talk about what little red riding hoods actual grandma must have looked like?

Mar 24, 2026

I did a little research on why weekends are only two days long and it turns out people made that up. WTF, people?

Mar 24, 2026

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Mar 24, 2026

Women know the exact weight of their children and their age in days. Men just know that little people live with them.

Mar 24, 2026

Some should judge a little less and look at their lives a little more.

Mar 24, 2026

I never had kids because little kids see too many ghosts and that’s something I’d rather not know about.

Mar 24, 2026

Today’s toddlers can switch on laptops and use apps. When I was little, I ate sand.

Mar 24, 2026

At the gym, everyone thinks exclusively about how little weight I can lift and how quickly I’m out of breath, because the world revolves around me.

Mar 24, 2026

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

Mar 24, 2026

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Mar 24, 2026

If I was a little smarter, I’d be aware of how stupid I am.

Mar 24, 2026

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

Mar 24, 2026

Grandma complained that with age, her joints were getting weaker. Told her to just roll them a little tighter.

Mar 24, 2026

I know I seem a little crazy sometimes, but that’s because I AM.

Mar 24, 2026

Parents be like “why aren’t you eating, don’t you like my food?” and after you eat a ton, they’ll say “you look a little chubby, maybe you should eat less.”

Mar 24, 2026

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

Mar 24, 2026

Some stupid little amoeba decided to leave the ocean a billion years ago and now I have to worry about Monday.

Mar 24, 2026

Worst part about not buying snacks so you won’t eat snacks is not having snacks when you need a lil snack.

Mar 23, 2026

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Mar 23, 2026

There’s no need to put a little umbrella in my drink. It’s already wet.

Mar 23, 2026

Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

Mar 23, 2026

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Mar 23, 2026

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Mar 23, 2026

If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

Mar 23, 2026

Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

Mar 23, 2026

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

Mar 23, 2026

Anyone else brush their teeth in the shower so they can get a little sloppy with it, or is that just me?

Mar 23, 2026

They won’t teach you this in school, but life is all about going to weird little diners.

Mar 23, 2026

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

Mar 23, 2026

When you’re feeling down, just turn up the music a little louder.

Mar 23, 2026

If your girlfriend doesn’t go a little psycho on you from time to time, then she’s not in love with you, sweetie.

Mar 22, 2026

Cats clean themselves with their little fish breath mouths, but somehow they always smell like laundry detergent, vanilla, and happiness.

Mar 22, 2026

A little 9-5 with a little fraud on the side is the only way you gone survive in this world.

Mar 22, 2026

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I never wanted to download the Microsoft Authenticator app on my personal phone to access every professional platform necessary to do my job.

Mar 22, 2026