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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

“I’m too young to be forgetting why I walked into a room.”

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

You can chill with someone a whole day at the university, and never see them again in your life, lol.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,299

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

Some people can’t sleep because they have insomnia. I can’t sleep because I have Internet.

Seen just now on X:

Guy inventing jogging: how can I suffer, but with music?

Spotted on Telegram:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Just landed via YouTube:

Wish I could just go back to eating cookies and not knowing what day it was.

Spotted on Threads:

I don’t give people directions. What if no one wants them there?

Going viral on Slack:

When I am calculating any risk, I think to myself: is this first cat life behavior? Or ninth cat life behavior?

Trending via Slack:

If I’m reading my Twitter feed correctly, Jennifer Aniston killed JFK.

Going viral on WeChat:

Nothing tops a plain pizza.

Just landed via Threads:

Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.

Trending via Facebook:

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

Funny marinara quotes

Funny marinara quotes 🍅 are the perfect sauce to spice up your day with a little humor and a whole lot of flavor! Whether you’re a pasta lover 🍝 or just here for the laughs 😂, these witty lines will have you saucing through life with a smile. Get ready to dip into some pun-filled fun that’s as irresistible as your favorite marinara! 🍽️🔥

New funny marinara quotes 👇

All funny marinara quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on Instagram this month:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

32 shares on WeChat this month:

Hike in groups. Bears like to have options.

75 shares on X this month:

Just took a nap in jeans. No one will ever understand the darkness that lurks inside me.

95 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s so hot, ice bears are opening lemonade stands.

76 shares on Twitch this month:

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

28 shares on Telegram this month:

The three people who like every single one of my posts are going in my will.

12 shares on YouTube this month:

Sorry, I ghosted you. I liked you too much.

15 shares on X this month:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

30 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m only awake because my coffee needs me.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s quite ironic that “strap on,” backwards, spells “no parts.”

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Thanks to social media, you can now meet weirdos from the comfort of your own home.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls with long hair will literally leave little traces of themselves wherever they go, like feathers falling from an angel’s wings.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The only warning I take seriously these days is when my cell phone battery is low.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Lord of the Rings is wild cause Gandalf told Frodo he had to go on a super dangerous journey and Frodo was like “Ok, can I bring my gardener?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,705

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

The older I get, the more I love my morning coffee and no one speaking to me.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Interpretive dance is the best way to answer stupid questions.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Getting real tired of my own bullshit.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

Getting tipsy at a dimly lit restaurant with good conversation would heal me right now.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, here’s Wonderwall.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

One time, when I was a kid, I fell off my bike and hit my head so hard, I was briefly able to communicate with bees.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WeChat:

You should be able to google why a couple broke up.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Trying is the first step toward failure.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I can always tell what part of my cycle I’m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I love when someone is like “I’m funny because I have trauma and it’s a coping mechanism” and it’s like “Okay, not to add to your trauma, but you’re not funny!”

Just landed via Threads:

“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

Just landed via YouTube:

When a documentary starts with an old person going, ‘We’re a small town, we didn’t lock our doors at night,’ oh, we’re gonna find out what made them start.

Going viral on Pinterest:

They say it is hard to look at lips that you are not allowed to kiss. You do not know how hard it is to look at a face that you are not allowed to hit.

Going bananas on Twitch:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

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