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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Summer: 10 minutes outside, 10 hours in front of the AC.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

USPS tracking: Step 1: We don’t think it exists. Step 2: Delivered.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

As a dad, you’re required to ask your neighbor “You gonna do mine next?” when you see them raking leaves.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

I wonder how much time The Weeknd saves not typing that extra e.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

If your name is “Guy”, you have lazy parents.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

When it rains in New York, the train starts smelling like hamster.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

The sole purpose of some household items is to make it impossible for you to open the damn drawer.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,640

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.

Going bananas on Reddit:

You know you’re an introvert when you want to go home before even leaving the house.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Nobody should be blowing up Teslas. If you just wait a bit, they’ll probably do it by themselves.

Seen just now on TikTok:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Can’t think of a single time the MGM lion advanced the plot of the movie in any way. Just needless jump scare.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

Live now on Discord:

Ever since I learned about the concept of networking, I knew I was going to have to do everything alone and do it the hard way.

Seen just now on Facebook:

God ate when he created sleep, what a beautiful concept.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Females be naked so much online, I be like, damn, I bet she look good in a sweater.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I miss when The Weeknd was making sex-addict-on-drugs music.

Funny not wanting quotes

Funny not wanting quotes bring a hilarious twist to those moments when you just *don’t* feel like doing something 🙅‍♂️😂 Whether it’s dodging chores, plans, or responsibilities, these playful lines capture the art of saying no with a smile 😎✨ Perfect for sharing when you’re fully embracing the lazy vibes or just need a good laugh about being totally unmotivated! 🛋️📵 #NoThanks #FunnyMood

New funny not wanting quotes 👇

All funny not wanting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on Threads this month:

After my death, I’ll be very busy. The list of people to whom I want to appear as a ghost is getting longer every day.

17 shares on Messenger this month:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

93 shares on YouTube this month:

I just sneezed my wife awake from a nap so any discussion about renewing vows is on hold for a bit.

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

43 shares on Threads this month:

I see from the back of your car that you have found Jesus, but not your turn signal.

77 shares on Threads this month:

The empty side of your bed is for books and chocolate, not for liars who snore.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s okay to admit you want my lips on yours.

49 shares on Reddit this month:

Get in loser. We’re going on a guilt trip.

98 shares on Snapchat this month:

Why do parents bust in your room like they trying to catch you cheating on them with another pair of parents or something?

55 shares on Slack this month:

Guess I’ll be getting the same thing for Christmas, again. Fat!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Suicide is never the answer, you gotta outlive your enemies.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not moody; I’m just on shuffle.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m going crazy, y’all. Coming with me?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I hated rats even before my girlfriend left me for one.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not falling for it again. These missions have been successful 8 times already.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you laugh at your own jokes, or are you emotionally stable?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m going to break into your house and steal that thing with the little wheels on it under the plate in your microwave.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Never going into a job interview nervous again, because, wow, it is literally a free invitation to talk about how amazing I am.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,294

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

I belong to the generation that repaired the TV with a single blow to the casing.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

I’ve been thinking. Is ‘fat’ short for anything? Like an old word or something?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

If the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree, my kids are screwed.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Making a grown man kiss his camera on Facetime.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Your pronouns are “side/chick”.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

Wanna know what the 90’s were like? Put your phone down and go outside.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Catching me in person is rare. I move like a ghost.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

No more learning experiences, please, God. I am smart enough.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

My acting reel includes clips of me “listening” during Zoom meetings.

Going viral on YouTube:

I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am at work.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Changed my bio on bumble to “I’m gonna murder ur whole family” and guys still responded.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Why is it called Christian community and not Holyfans?

Seen just now on Threads:

Just a little reminder to laugh as much as you can, stay hydrated, and don’t let shitty people kill your vibe.

Making waves on X:

Let me help you turn that software into hardware.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

My bed has a stronger influence on me than my ambitions.

Just shared via X:

Sorry, I can’t today. I have to sit in my room and make matters worse.

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