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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Gravestone inscription: “Hey guys, I’m going to be taking a little break from social media”

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

You should tell different people completely different things about yourself so that they then get into arguments when gossiping about you.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

She was my chai, I was her cake rusk.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

You think you’ve seen gold diggers, until you see a male friend group where only one of them made it.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Time needs a speed limit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,932

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

2 seconds ago

Users Online

3,420

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life, and the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to keep it interesting.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Trending via WeChat:

Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.

Spotted on X:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Trending via WeChat:

I’ve done the math: If the month had 10 days, I would get by with my money.

Just landed via Reddit:

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

Going viral on WeChat:

Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Girls will be like “I have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

Just landed via WeChat:

The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place.

Just landed via Instagram:

Seize the day! Unless it sucks. Then seize the next one.

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Funny Pete Davidson quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,932

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

2 seconds ago

Users Online

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

I saw a spider crawl under my kid’s bed and was too tired to go after it, but that’s okay, no living creature can survive that environment.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

I took the first step towards cleaning out my closet today. I went in there and looked it over good.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

I put the hot in psychotic.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

I wish my hair had as much volume as my mouth.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Any place is a walkable city if you’re broke enough.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun not to be able to open that drawer.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Broadcasted on Threads:

At no single point in the Bible does it tell you not to sell drugs.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

Making waves on YouTube:

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.

Reported on YouTube:

They should invent a good thing that happens.

Just shared via Threads:

The worst part about going to work is the part where you have to go to work.

Just shared via Messenger:

I can’t stand people who require so much validation. Please like and share this if you agree.

Breaking via Discord:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

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