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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

If you call me “daddy” in bed, I will immediately stop what we are doing and make you clean your room.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Idea: An app that tells you where that bruise came from.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Pirate: walks the plank. Someone’s dad: Is this teak?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

You’re like if “nope” was a person.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Having hoes in different area codes sounds really exhausting.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

24 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Shared recently on Discord:

Hell, yes, I work out. Somebody has to support the ibuprofen industry.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m homeless. Minus the ‘m’.

Trending via Messenger:

When you think about it, Jesus really accomplished a lot in the four months between Christmas and Easter.

Breaking via Slack:

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

Spotted on X:

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

Making waves on YouTube:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

Trending via Instagram:

There is a reason I’m single and it’s called my face.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I’m tired of commercials trying to be funny. Scare me into buying something. I want to be terrified of buying the wrong toothpaste.

Live now on Snapchat:

Don’t invite me places. I was cesarean. I didn’t want to come out then and I certainly don’t want to now.

Home » Funny Sickening Quotes

Funny sickening quotes

New funny sickening quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'elbow waterfall' maneuver in every face washing routine – a truly exhilarating experience for all, except maybe your elbow! 🚿💦😄"

For even more funny sickening quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny sickening quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

24 minutes ago

3,418

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Me, seeing a man proposing to a woman in public: Hey, this guy bothering you?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Apparently you’re not supposed to announce that there’s been a death in the family every time you kill a houseplant.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I bet before the band got popular, Barenaked Ladies concerts had a lot of pissed off attendees.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Being a goldfish must be brilliant. Every six seconds you’re pleasantly surprised to find that you live in a castle.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

I’m at the age where drinking a cup of coffee now makes me feel like Popeye scarfing down a can of spinach.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

I was actually doing so well until your email found me.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

I really want a family… sized bag of peanut butter M&Ms.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

This Monday could have been an email.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

Making waves on YouTube:

I don’t procrastinate, I delegate to my future self.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Naked and Afraid because there’s a spider in the shower with me.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

We were having tea with my mother-in-law the other day and out of the blue she said, “I’ve decided I want to be cremated.” I said, “Alright, get your coat.”

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

Just landed via X:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

Shared recently on Twitch:

Are you in love with me yet or do I have to post another Spotify link?

Breaking via Discord:

Whenever I’m not eating a breakfast sandwich I wish I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Going viral on Threads:

At 30+, I’m like an old phone battery. Even when you charge me overnight for 10 hours, by midday I’m at 60%.

Going viral on Threads:

My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.

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