Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

I don’t even check my bank account no more. I just swipe my card and if it’s god’s will, money will be debited.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Mister Sandman, bring me a meme. Make it the dumbest shit that I’ve ever seen.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

That uncle or aunt who kept their distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense as you get older.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

This can’t be the life I protected with a mask in 2020.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Welcome to adulthood. You have a favorite gas station now.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

A fly swatter, but for close talkers.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,670

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

The dragon with the girl tattoo.

Trending via TikTok:

I was telling my sister that I’ve been going to the gym recently, and my nephew said, “You should go inside when you get there,” and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from that.

Live now on X:

Relationships are only serious when photos are posted by a man.

Making waves on Reddit:

Went fishing and actually caught a fish. So now I gotta deal with this shit.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Remember, for some unknown reason Santa doesn’t make batteries.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

It’s with a heavy heart and a deep sadness that I have to announce that I’m at work.

Going viral on Reddit:

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Just shared via Instagram:

They should invent a person for me and me only.

Just shared via Instagram:

God: “You’re all really bad at this.”

Just shared via Threads:

You spend so long trying to think of a name for your cat only to end up calling them “for god’s sake” and “please stop”.

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Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on YouTube this month:

I hate when people ask me: “Why are you so quiet?” Because I am. That’s how I function. I don’t ask others, “Why do you talk so much?” It’s rude.

59 shares on Facebook this month:

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

47 shares on Threads this month:

I really miss my family… sized bag of crisps.

82 shares on Slack this month:

I love Pinterest. No opinions. No bad vibes. Just pretty pictures.

23 shares on Instagram this month:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $1 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst anniversary gifts ever.

32 shares on Instagram this month:

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life, and the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to keep it interesting.

68 shares on Instagram this month:

I haven’t worn a trench coat since a random man in his 60s said to me “what are you looking for, detective?”

42 shares on YouTube this month:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

54 shares on Discord this month:

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Current state of politics: The circus is on fire but the monkey is fine.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so single. When they ask me for an emergency contact, I put the neighbor’s dog.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m running out of people I like.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

All soups are gazpacho if you’re lazy enough.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

None of the Instagram story fonts represent me.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I don’t want to go.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Do y’all ever think about how, in Korean, you can’t scream over text because there’s no uppercase… I think about that all the time, for some reason.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,249

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

What’s really missing is a day between Saturday and Sunday.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Women’s skincare is so confusing. Am I supposed to look shiny and sweaty, or matte like cement?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

ChatGPT is there for me in ways I don’t think any man ever could be.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Checking a selfie only to find there’s a demon in the reflection behind you, and it looks significantly healthier than you.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Accept the truth that a clean kitchen and finished laundry are just myths. Embrace the chaos and find your inner calm.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Much like lasagna, I’m just held together by cheese at this point.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?

Going viral on Slack:

Opening up is like talking to a cop: anything you say can and will be used against you.

Seen just now on X:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

Making waves on Snapchat:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Breaking via Telegram:

Starting is the hardest part. Unless it’s eating chocolate. Then stopping is the hardest part.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Basically a lot of my problems boil down to me being really bad at waking up, and also really bad at going to sleep.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I’m ready to try another planet.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Asian girl at tech company: Wow, everyone here is so friendly.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I wish I was a moose. No work, no school, just eating grass and wrecking cars.

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