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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

It’s so beautiful when two real perverts find each other.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I have money, then I don’t have money, it all happens so fast!

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

The final act of love is not texting them happy birthday.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,380

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

When I put on weight, it’s around my stomach. When I lose weight, it’s around my legs. I’m not a structural engineer, but that can’t be good.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

It is so weird that every single one of us is going to die, and we are not nicer to each other.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

“You just want an easy life.” Should I want a difficult one?

Going viral on X:

Your call is really important to us but first enjoy this clarinet number for the next seventy five minutes.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Breaking via WeChat:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Welcome to Twitter, where people never let their lack of knowledge get in the way of expressing a strong opinion.

Just landed via Pinterest:

To think that billions in venture capital have been deployed because it was annoying to copy and paste from ChatGPT.

Funny state law quotes

New funny state law quotes 👇

Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

3 weeks ago

God, gratitude, humor, i, joint, joints, law, marijuana, medical, medical marijuana, need, pain, pain relief, relief, state, state law, thanks

All funny state law quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on YouTube this month:

I love saying “my man” and not his name, so when I get a new one, nobody knows.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

39 shares on Pinterest this month:

Where do we acquire the ducks that we’re supposed to be putting in a row?

86 shares on Instagram this month:

I’ve been dieting for a little over a week and I already gained three pounds.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

My favorite part of parenting is being exhausted all the time and losing the will to live.

16 shares on Twitch this month:

If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

36 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

98 shares on Twitch this month:

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

66 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Turns out I like you a lot more than I originally planned.

37 shares on X this month:

Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

The single star on Texas’ flag is actually a review.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Is there a job where I can lay on the floor and listen to music?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello.” My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

I used to look for monsters under the bed. Today I know they are behind some people’s fake smiles.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

What do you call it when everything pisses you off but you’re good at not murdering people?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

I love my cat so much, but how the hell are you that small and take up an entire queen-size mattress?

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

If consuming too much caffeine causes short-term memory loss, just imagine what consuming too much caffeine can do.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Be yourself cause no one wants to be like you!

Going viral on Pinterest:

In an effort to demonstrate how pointless internet debates are, please prove to me that snow is real.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Told my homie I was “going through it” and he just said “go around it”.

Making waves on Instagram:

The French only eat snails because they don’t like fast food.

Going bananas on Slack:

Just asked this girl Hannah how she spells her name, and she just said, “Two of everything, darling.” Iconic!

Just landed via Telegram:

If you shouldn’t go food shopping when you’re hungry, then you should definitely not go clothes shopping when you’re naked. Trust me on this.

Just shared via Messenger:

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Spotted on YouTube:

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

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Funny state law quotes

New funny state law quotes 👇

Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

All funny state law quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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