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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

People who live in glass houses should be put on a watchlist.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk calmly to the lock. We all know that communication is the key.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

They say that 50 is the new 40, but these traffic police are having none of it.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

They should invent a rest for the wicked.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

There’s no need to put a little umbrella in my drink. It’s already wet.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Bugs Bunny was my introduction to opera. Can’t say I’ve kept up with it much since.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Absolutely destroyed my bed last night… I cuddled those covers so hard.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Being alive and sentient has been the worst thing to have ever happened to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,275

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Dear algorithm, only show this post to the most attractive and successful people.

Just landed via Slack:

The only men you can trust is ramen.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

Just shared via Telegram:

The only reason I insist on returning to the office is because my cat needs a break from me staring at him all day.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Very disappointed by the symbolism of last night’s dream. Just really obvious, derivative stuff.

Broadcasted on X:

Boyfriend hasn’t accepted my LinkedIn request yet. He doesn’t want to connect. He doesn’t want to build.

Breaking via Threads:

If boring was a brand, you’d be the ambassador.

Making waves on Slack:

Occupation: the ugly friend!

Shared recently on Threads:

Napping is the best activity for weight loss, because I can’t eat anything when I’m asleep!

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

The place where you pour in the gas is the car’s gasshole.

Funny stress ball quotes

Funny stress ball quotes bring a burst of laughter to your squeeze sessions! 😄✨ Perfect for turning stress into smiles, these quirky phrases make your desk buddy more entertaining than ever. Whether you’re crushing deadlines or just need a quick mood boost, a funny stress ball adds that extra dose of joy and relaxation. Ready to chuckle your stress away? Let’s dive into some hilarious vibes! 😂🧠💥

New funny stress ball quotes 👇

All funny stress ball quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on WeChat this month:

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

61 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m in my thirties, but I still feel like I am in my twenties; then I hang out with people in their twenties, and I’m like nope, definitely in my thirties.

61 shares on Threads this month:

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

66 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Proverbs are so mean. Like, I don’t deserve any worm because I woke up at 11am? Like, no worm at all?

79 shares on YouTube this month:

I love men with a provider fetish.

41 shares on Pinterest this month:

Maturing is realizing you’re not stable enough to do mushrooms.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

30 shares on Threads this month:

“You replied so quickly.” God forbid I wait like a dog to hear from you again.

96 shares on Slack this month:

Me, waiting on an email: What the hell is taking so long, this is ridiculous. Me, sending an email: this can probably wait another three weeks or so.

71 shares on Pinterest this month:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I never knew how fast I could write until the teacher said pencils down.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Zelda was easier as a kid because if you hit a hard puzzle, you could just wait a few days for more brain matter to come in, but now it’s the opposite.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Learning to be Alpha from YouTube.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I would rather walk barefoot across a carpet made out of Legos than go to my high school reunion.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,590

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Remember: The first step to recovery is addiction.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but throw away your disgusting dish sponge.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

And to my children, I leave 127 open tabs on Safari.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

It’s lowkey nothing else to do except become a better version of yourself, lol.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I had to quit my job because people kept falling in love with me there.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If they can bring back the dire wolf, they can bring back Norm Macdonald.

Making waves on YouTube:

I have never seen a sad person sliding down a water slide.

Going viral on Facebook:

You haven’t experienced proper anger until you have a sister.

Seen just now on Messenger:

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

Going viral on Pinterest:

When I was a kid, we weren’t allowed to use our phones in school. Mainly because the cords wouldn’t reach.

Breaking via WeChat:

Some people identify as funnier than they actually are.

Spotted on X:

I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

Just shared via Reddit:

Maybe the wolf from The Neverending Story still has nightmares about me, too.

Making waves on YouTube:

I might be late to a lot of places, but the airport is not one of them.

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