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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Tolerate the lactose already, you heathen.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Happy new fear!

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

This is my emotional support online shopping cart.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

King-sized beds: Because you both want to sleep on the same mattress, but not in the same zip code.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

9 minutes ago

Users Online

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Even at my most evil, I’m considerate.

Just shared via Telegram:

At this point, Tom Cruise is a stuntman who does his own acting.

Trending via X:

Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

Reported on WhatsApp:

If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

Reported on TikTok:

Why are so many people going everywhere whenever I have to go anywhere?

Just shared via X:

Your honor, I was in my villain era at the time of those incidents.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’ve got a neighbor who’s really into morons. I should introduce her to you guys.

Just landed via Telegram:

If you can reach enlightenment, can you also reach endarkenment?

Just shared via TikTok:

If you think my posts are horrid, wait until you see the live stream of my colonoscopy.

Just landed via X:

They should invent a customer service center that isn’t “currently experiencing higher than normal call volume”.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

9 minutes ago

Users Online

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

No, I’m not stressed. I just constantly grind my teeth and clench my jaw for fun.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

My home security system is just a copy of my paycheck taped to my front door.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Oops, I think I’ve had a little too much to think.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

They all cheat, lie and manipulate. Just pick the pretty one.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, I shut it off and back on again, why are you still here?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

So excited to go to bed and have the worst sleep of my life, and wake up exhausted and aching.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’ve been saving these cleavage crumbs just for you babe.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

It’s getting very expensive to be alive.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

German couples probably have less arguments because there’s an exact word for, “I’m fine, just annoyed you forgot the milk again”.

Just landed via Twitch:

Everyone who dramatically ‘quits’ social media is back in 48 hours like it was just a trial separation.

Reported on X:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Making waves on Twitch:

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

Reported on YouTube:

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

Making waves on Twitch:

When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

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