64 Funny trust quotes

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Cheating on a partner should affect your credit score.

  Commentary:
  "Breaking hearts should tank your FICO! 💔📉 #RelationshipCreditScore"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: They should invent a man who is being genuine when he says things to me.

  Commentary:
  "Manufacturing delay: man still in beta testing! 😂🔧 #GenuineVersionComingSoon"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Women who don’t check a man’s phone will still use their intuition and dreams to find out if he’s cheating.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the incredible superpower of women's intuition – capable of unlocking the mysteries of the universe, one dream and suspicion at a time! 🕵️‍♀️💭 It's like having a built-in CIA agent in your head, on a mission to expose any potential hanky-panky! 🔍😂 After all, who needs to check a phone when you have a direct line to the cosmic truth hotline?! 🌟📞 Remember, never underestimate the

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Your secrets are safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.

  Commentary:
  "Your secrets are totally safe with me 💬🙉 I wasn't even listening, let alone storing them in my mental vault 🤫🔒 Whoops, did I just reveal my impeccable memory skills? 😂 #SelectiveHearing"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Home is where you trust the toilet seat.

  Commentary:
  "Home is where you trust the toilet seat… and hope the floor isn't too cold in the middle of the night 😅🚽 #TheStruggleIsReal"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Never trust a wet fart.

  Commentary:
  "Remember, folks: Never trust a wet fart 💨🙅‍♂️ Just like lukewarm coffee and week-old pizza, some things are best left untested 😂 #LessonLearned"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.

  Commentary:
  "Parents: the only people who simultaneously teach you skepticism and fall for a 'Free Cruise to the Bahamas' ad on Facebook. The irony is strong with this one!"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Home is where you trust the toilet seats.

  Commentary:
  "Home is where you trust the toilet seats…and that's when you know you've found true love and comfort! 🏡💕 Just be sure to give your toilet seat a little pep talk every now and then for good measure! 😄🚽 #HomeSweetHome"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Are you telling me these billionaires don’t have my best interests at heart?!

  Commentary:
  Oh, sweetheart, if billionaires had your best interests at heart, they'd be sending you care packages with solid gold snacks! 🤑💔 #TrustIssues

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Opening up to people is a scam. Don’t do it.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew vulnerability came with a 'no refunds' policy? 🤷‍♂️😄 Next time, I'll just stick to opening up jars of pickles instead! 😉🥒"

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