Commentary:
"Betrayal is like herpes – it's the gift that keeps on giving, whether you want it or not… 🤣💔"
95 Funny trust quotes
Missionary, so I can look him in the eyes and ask him why Ashley from work is texting him with heart eyes.
Commentary:
"Looks like we've got a covert operation on our hands – Operation: Heart Eyes! 🕵️♂️💌 Keep your enemies close and your co-workers closer, especially the hearts-for-eyes types! 😂💔 #SpyGames"
Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.
Commentary:
Oh, so you're a millennial time traveler, huh? 😂🕰️ Must be tricky keeping up with all those different decades of memes and avocado toast trends! Just make sure you're not sipping on your oat milk latte in the wrong century! 🥑☕ #MillennialTimeTravelerGoals
Trust my gut? The thing that tricks me into buying gas station sushi and roller dogs? No thanks.
Commentary:
"Trusting my gut has led me to some questionable decisions, like a regrettable rendezvous with gas station sushi and roller dogs 😅🌭🍣 Maybe I'll start listening to my brain instead!"
There’s something about Dracula I just don’t trust.
Commentary:
"Maybe it's the whole 'never invites you in for a cup of tea' vibe he's got going on 🧛♂️. I mean, it's hard to trust someone whose favorite color is blood red, am I right? 😅"
Mercury is no longer in retrograde, so never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim.
Commentary:
Well, they do say never trust a cow especially when the sun can't swim! 🐄🌞 Mercury is finally back on track, so maybe now the cows can get their act together too. Don't let those sneaky cows fool you while Mercury is direct! 😉🔮
I need new friends. The old ones know too much.
Commentary:
"Looking for new friends to keep things exciting and keep my secrets safe! 🤫🤣 Who else is on the hunt for fresh confidants? #OutWithTheOld #InWithTheNew"
Politics top tip: Gain people’s trust by telling them that everyone is lying to them.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic political strategy: convince everyone that you're the only honest one in a sea of deception! 🕵️♂️🤥 Who knew the key to trust was a well-crafted conspiracy theory? 😂 Just remember, it's all fun and games until people start questioning if even you are lying about lying! 🤔🤫 #TrustNoOne"
How do I even know this guy is my “boss”? I’ve just been taking his word for it.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of official job title skepticism! 🕵️♂️ Maybe your 'boss' is just a really convincing cosplayer? 🤔 Remember, anyone can claim to be a boss, but leading with style and influence is what truly makes you the boss! 💼💪"
What does my tattoo mean? It means I couldn’t be trusted with $200 when I was 18.
Commentary:
Ah, the eternal conundrum of youthful decisions immortalized in ink! 💸🤷♂️ Lesson learned: always think twice before getting that tattoo… or managing a sum of money! 😆 #InkRegrets