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Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Turning to the person next to me and saying “thanks for nothing” as I get off the train.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

I’m old enough to remember when regular websites were usable.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Keep moving, lady, I don’t have room for you in my delusions right now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,925

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

For once, I would just like to underthink a situation. How do you guys do that?

Live now on Messenger:

That one person who has zero concept of what an indoor voice is.

Just shared via Threads:

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

Trending via Facebook:

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

My theory is that women’s voices contain frequencies that men simply can’t hear.

Breaking via WeChat:

My diet was going really well until I woke up.

Home » Funny Unemployment Quotes » Page 2

14 Funny unemployment quotes

More funny unemployment quotes 👇

100% of all babіes are unemployed. Pathetіc.

1 month ago
baby, humor, irony, joke, pathetic, unemployment
Lost my job to AI (my job was to be loudly and confidently incorrect).

2 months ago
AI, automation, confidence, humor, incorrect, irony, job, lost, technology, unemployment
When the job market is so bad that you’re going to follow your dreams instead.

3 months ago
bad, career, choice, dream, dreams, follow, going, humor, job, job market, life, life choice, market, motivation, unemployment
Fun prank: make people study for 16 years, and then don’t give them jobs.

3 months ago
education, fun, give, humor, irony, job, jobs, people, prank, sarcasm, study, unemployment

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All funny unemployment quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

I’m actually really fun once you get to know me (takes 3-4 years).

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

ADHD is: being pretty good at basically anything you want to be, and absolutely terrible at anything you need to do to live.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I don’t text. I will contact you telepathically.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

This coffee isn’t working. Think I need holy water.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Quitting my job to rock around the Christmas tree.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Me: “I should treat myself to something.” My bank account: “Dream on.”

Shared recently on Instagram:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

Just shared via Reddit:

Manifesting you in my bed.

Making waves on WeChat:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

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14 Funny unemployment quotes

More funny unemployment quotes 👇

100% of all babіes are unemployed. Pathetіc.

Lost my job to AI (my job was to be loudly and confidently incorrect).

When the job market is so bad that you’re going to follow your dreams instead.

Fun prank: make people study for 16 years, and then don’t give them jobs.

All funny unemployment quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Garlic bread is my therapist now.

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

It can be so healing to stay up until 3am. Unfortunately, it will also completely ruin your life.

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

My budget for this month is a smile, and I don’t know how long that will last.

Hello, hi. Don’t invite me anywhere until next year. The money is finished. Regards.

Getting a random boner is a bit funny. Like, what is it, boy? What do you see?

He just walked right into my heart and switched on the lights.

Hey, so this Mercury retrograde is actually really demonic and soul-crippling. Let’s wrap this up by midnight.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Overheard the most hilarious conversation on my morning commute, then realized it was just me talking to myself in my car.

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

Dating me is super easy. I text you at 8; you reply at 8:00:01.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

Me, to the printer: “Hey, could you print this out for me?” Printer: “Sure, but first I’ll show you all the sounds I can make.”

I hate when people set alarms and it wakes up everybody except for them.

Due to the humidity, my hair has chosen violence.

Crazy that caffeine has no short or long-term negative side effects. Just a super drug from God.

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