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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Wait, some of you are actually seeing for free? No glasses, no contacts? Wow!

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

There should be bloopers at the end of horror movies, so it relaxes you before bedtime.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Men have feelings too! Hunger, for example. Or thirst.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

That moment when you have to restart a song because the conversations in your head got too loud and you missed half the song.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Felony Vandalism is a beautiful name for a girl.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,479

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Mayor of a small town is such a wild job. It’s like being the president of a country where you went to high school with the whole population.

Spotted on Discord:

A penguin is a bird the way a hot dog is a sandwich.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Hair is unwashed, so I obviously feel like I’m fundamentally unlovable.

Going viral on X:

All the leaves are brown. And this guy is Greg.

Spotted on Snapchat:

A good French onion soup will have you acting like a pervert.

Live now on Threads:

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Just shared via WeChat:

Brains are awesome. I wish I had one.

Shared recently on Reddit:

A moth flies into your face out of nowhere. You could ask him why he does that, but what would you do with the information?

Trending via Threads:

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

Going viral on TikTok:

Putting a hot frying pan into a sink running with cold water makes me feel like a blacksmith.

Funny unforeseen circumstances quotes

New funny unforeseen circumstances quotes 👇

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

3 days ago

acting, acting weird, circumstances, day, due, humor, humorist, i, quirky, today, unexpected, unforeseen, unforeseen circumstances, weird

All funny unforeseen circumstances quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Messenger this month:

There should be a special rating system for movies that tells you how uncomfortable you’ll be if you watch them with your parents.

72 shares on Instagram this month:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

43 shares on TikTok this month:

I had no social life in high school. Even my imaginary best friend had a date for the prom.

97 shares on Slack this month:

Whoever said it was okay to let your pets sleep in your bed, thanks a lot, now my goldfish is dead.

53 shares on Slack this month:

Time to get off the internet, I’ve already had enough stupid for the week.

100 shares on Facebook this month:

Jingle all the way? In this economy?

52 shares on Messenger this month:

“I’ll see” = not coming, never was coming, never even considered it.

95 shares on Twitch this month:

My role at Thanksgiving dinner is to Blair Witch it alone in the corner.

72 shares on Facebook this month:

Girls ask for help to open a jar, but can throw a couch during an argument.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

Girls be like, “I know a spot,” then sacrifice you under the full moon.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, sleeping for work, getting ready for work, or thinking about work.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

You ever tried driving the speed limit and thought, “They can’t be serious.”

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

That one British friend that’s too bloke.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

I honestly have no idea what a vitamin is. It’s in a banana but it’s also the sun? Sure.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

The moment when I drop my phone, but my fast reflexes slam it into a bloody wall.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Every grocery store becomes an escape room if you see someone you know.

Just shared via YouTube:

There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.

Spotted on WeChat:

Showering & getting in bed is literally one of the best combos ever.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I love when someone is telling a story and you can tell even from their version that they’re the villain.

Breaking via Discord:

Twitter is basically everyone’s therapist’s couch.

Spotted on Telegram:

You just can’t live a full life on an empty stomach.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Every Reddit relationship post is like “My husband dropped a big piano on my head and when I emerged from the rubble my teeth had been replaced by the keys. Am I in the wrong?”

Shared recently on Slack:

Sex is cool, but have you ever had garlic bread?

Making waves on Snapchat:

Posing for photos has to be the most basic thing I’m actually terrible at.

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Funny unforeseen circumstances quotes

New funny unforeseen circumstances quotes 👇

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

All funny unforeseen circumstances quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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