Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Well, hindsight is 20/20, even for the Almighty! 💸 Maybe next time, God will offer a 'Free Will Premium Package' with extra perks and maybe a discount code for good deeds. 😂 #DivinePricingStrategy"

bad, bad idea, charge, charged, free, free will, God, humor, i, idea, irony, philosophy, religion, should

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer and my alarm is the police.

0

2 months ago

alarm, bed, drug, police, sleep
It’s not a Sunday unless you completely waste it and then feel sad around 8 p.m.

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6 months ago

around, day, evening, feel, lazy, lazy day, management, procrastination, regret, sad, sadness, Sunday, time, time management, waste, weekend
Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

0

2 months ago

anger, angry, bait, before, frustration, humor, i, me, mood, rage, rage bait, reaction, read, works
Twitter is evidence that insane people can be extremely entertaining from a safe distance.

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2 months ago

distance, entertaining, evidence, humor, insane, media, observation, people, safe, social, social media, Twitter
Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

0

2 months ago

activity, couch, day, good, humor, leisure, making, most, relaxation, spent, still, sure, work, works
Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

0

2 months ago

12, 3, 4, before, charge, comedy, directing, episodes, films, humor, movie, movie order, order, sci-fi, star, Star Wars, wars, Yoda

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on Snapchat this month:

AI won’t replace me because I’m already useless to society.

69 shares on Facebook this month:

Caesar, looking shocked: “Is it bring your knife to work day or something?”

42 shares on Discord this month:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at intimacy.

98 shares on YouTube this month:

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

“You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hey Grok, scan through all my mutuals and find me a girlfriend, thanks!

91 shares on Slack this month:

The inventor of autocorrect walked into a bar and ordered a bear.

54 shares on Pinterest this month:

Love is in the air fryer.

16 shares on Pinterest this month:

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok.” Well, I just made some shit up, and people believe me because I’m well read and use big words.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Gay? We don’t use that word anymore. Person of rainbow.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

So we have actual fact checkers who know all the facts? Why not create a TV channel where they just give us the facts? We could call it the News.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

The real me comes out at midnight (it’s just me spending money online).

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I’m attracted to people that no one pays attention to.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Many of you need to put “lighten up” on your resolutions list.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

The idea that wisdom teeth are just some random glitch that God forgot to patch, so now we have to pull them out with modern technology, is retarded.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I bought a “How to Be Spontaneous” course… it starts in six months.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I do not want to have a career. I want to sit on the porch.

Shared recently on Instagram:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Making waves on Telegram:

He doesn’t realize it yet, but this Saturday, I’ll be asking him to untangle 400 feet of Christmas lights.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Help, I accidentally used dark humor with normal people, and now they’re concerned for my mental health.

Just landed via Slack:

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The way Adele works for 6 months and then disappears for 7 years is very much the work-life balance I’m all about.

Trending via Messenger:

Why does everyone force introverts to leave their comfort zone, but no one forces extroverts to shut up for a while?

Making waves on WeChat:

Apparently, “spite” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

Seen just now on Discord:

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer and my alarm is the police.

It’s not a Sunday unless you completely waste it and then feel sad around 8 p.m.

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

Twitter is evidence that insane people can be extremely entertaining from a safe distance.

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨