Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

When intelligence meets empathy and kindness, it’s so sexy.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

I often message people with the weird idea that they’ll message me back.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Women love asking you questions about the movie you both are watching.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

A toddler in their “why” phase makes you realize how little you know.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

People make the mistake of keeping aubergines in the fridge, when in fact they should be kept in the bin.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

I’m uncomfortable around tall people. What if they pick me up and put me on their shoulders?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,305

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

Just landed via Instagram:

The angel and devil on my shoulders are both completely fed up with me.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.

Just landed via Discord:

Just say ‘lol’ and move on.

Spotted on Instagram:

To think that billions in venture capital have been deployed because it was annoying to copy and paste from ChatGPT.

Making waves on Instagram:

I hate when you leave your phone on the side, and it brings up that red evil clock.

Trending via Discord:

Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.

Spotted on Messenger:

When I was a kid, no phones or tablets. We just read the cereal box at breakfast.

Shared recently on Discord:

If anyone wants to watch the Super Bowl on a large 8k TV, come on over to my place (and bring a large 8k TV).

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word.

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

2 days ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about tackling personal struggles with humor at the gym.

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Commentary:
"Off to the gym to sweat out my demons and get that exorcise! 💪😈 #FitnessGoals #DemonsBeGone"

demons, exercise, fitness, going, gym, health, humor, mental, mental health, self-improvement, working, working out

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

2 weeks ago

1994, 6, aging, back, chin, chin hair, exaggeration, eyebrow, eyebrow hair, facial, facial hair, five, friends, friendship, growth, hair, hair growth, humor, never, pluck, single, time, today
Every man’s biggest fear is trying a new barber.

2 days ago

barber, change, every, fear, haircut, humor, men, new, trust, trying
If you think one of my posts is about you, it isn’t. Except this one.

1 week ago

communication, except, humor, misunderstanding, post, posts, sarcasm, think
Call me old, but these days I just get excited to go home and lay down.

2 months ago

age, call, comfort, days, excited, excitement, home, i, just, lay, lay down, me, old, old age, relaxation, tiredness
“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

2 weeks ago

appearance, honesty, humor, just, sarcasm, self-deprecation, tired, ugly
Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

1 day ago

boss, day, day off, excuse, fun, i, outside, play, playing, sorry, today, work

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Twitch this month:

You think you’re cool and then you see a video of yourself running.

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

25 shares on YouTube this month:

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

74 shares on TikTok this month:

My tombstone will read “Hey there, I’m using WhatsApp!”.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

Robots eating a bowl of cereal that’s actually a bunch of nuts and bolts, you don’t see that as much anymore.

73 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

76 shares on WeChat this month:

I found out my husband was cheating on me at a Linkin Park concert. We tried so hard and got so far, but in the end, it didn’t even matter.

65 shares on Threads this month:

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

58 shares on X this month:

Putting your wedding scrapbook in the little free library is an unprecedented level of divorced.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Dogs will go through amazing effort to get a better view of your plate.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

The peace of not knowing.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

I can’t believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician. I was just sitting there doing nothing.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who’s talking to himself.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Do not EVER text while driving. Please use the giant iPad attached to your dashboard.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Seeing a BBL in real life is a reality-altering experience.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Our parents are going to be shocked when they find out that most of us are serious about not getting married.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

When my husband says, “Let me ask my wife,” he’s just using me as an excuse to get out of whatever you’re asking him to do.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

If buying isn’t owning, then pirating isn’t stealing.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

I wait all week for the weekend just to aggressively do nothing in five different outfits.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WhatsApp:

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

Just landed via Twitch:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Trending via Twitch:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

Shared recently on Messenger:

“No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Forever grateful that thought bubbles aren’t a real thing.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Telling men I have a boyfriend doesn’t chase them away anymore, so I’ve started telling them I have a child.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

It’s been a pleasure miscommunicating with you.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Spending all my money on lottery tickets so I’ll either be rich or poor, none of this wishy-washy stuff in the middle.

Going bananas on TikTok:

ChatGPT, what do you do when you find out your boyfriend’s been using ChatGPT to write you messages?

Going viral on TikTok:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

Every man’s biggest fear is trying a new barber.

If you think one of my posts is about you, it isn’t. Except this one.

Call me old, but these days I just get excited to go home and lay down.

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨