Wordgag ツ

"Good morning only to those who fancy themselves as duelists at dawn, sommeliers at dusk, and ghosts of love affairs in between. May your day be as dramatic as your lifestyle choices! 😄🎭"

activity, dawn, drink, duel, dusk, good, haunt, humor, lover, lovers, morning, night, only

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The lion doesn’t concern himself with credit card debt.

0

2 months ago

animal, card, concern, credit, credit card debt, debt, finance, humor, joke, lion, metaphor, money, stress
Tons of names in my phones are “Kenny Landlord,” “Mike Electric,” or “Pete Do Not Answer,” and I just realized this is how Anglo surnames have always worked.

0

2 months ago

always, Anglo, answer, contacts, electric, humor, i, just, landlord, Mike, name, names, phone, phone contacts, phones, realization, surname
You can tell they named the aardvark early in the week and the anteater on a Friday.

0

2 months ago

aardvark, animals, anteater, early, Friday, funny observation, humor, naming, observation, tell, week
I bet being full feels so good for the moon.

0

2 months ago

being, bet, feels, full, good, i, moon
Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

0

2 months ago

activity, bite, change, changing, date, dating, eating, every, food, humor, just, me, minutes, restaurant, social, speed, speed date, table, trying
Men be like, “That’s my dream girl,” then ruin her perspective of love forever.

0

3 months ago

dating, dream, dream girl, forever, girl, heartbreak, humor, love, man, men, perspective, relationship, ruin

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Telegram this month:

The husband, child, and dog are all snoring. WTF is this?

38 shares on Reddit this month:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

78 shares on Discord this month:

Floppy disks are like Jesus. They died to become the icon of saving.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

Spotify Wrapped, but for all your bad decisions this year.

72 shares on Slack this month:

Can someone call my keys? I forgot where I put them.

87 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sunday night: Super Bowl party! Monday morning: Toilet Bowl party!

99 shares on WeChat this month:

Willem Dafoe gets to be in two different Nosferatu movies, whereas the average person doesn’t even get to be in one.

24 shares on Discord this month:

This meeting could have been a pajama party.

46 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Skinning your knee as an adult is so humiliating. That’s the toddler injury.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

The only thing I gained this year is weight.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

Cursing after hitting oneself can reduce the pain by up to 50%.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

My life changed when I learned some house spiders can’t survive outside, so now I just catch them and release them in a friend’s home.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

If I was polyamorous, I think Id date my girlfriend three times.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Hate it when I pull out a winter coat and there’s no money stashed in it.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

My girlfriend just had a go at me for not glistening, whatever that is.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Employees should have to take their boss’s last name.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

My wife just admitted a mistake. What do I have to do now? What does this mean for my future? Help me!

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I did some exercise in 2010, I should be good for another few years.

Breaking via WeChat:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to be electrocuted and get my memory erased.

Trending via YouTube:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Spotted on Twitch:

Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Breaking via Threads:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be turning you into a poem.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Going viral on X:

I bet she doesn’t even laugh at your dumb jokes the fake way I did.

Live now on Reddit:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

Just landed via X:

Is it stupid and irresponsible? Yes. Will it make me happy? Also yes.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Good morning only to those who duel at dawn, drink at dusk, and haunt their lovers in between.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The lion doesn’t concern himself with credit card debt.

Tons of names in my phones are “Kenny Landlord,” “Mike Electric,” or “Pete Do Not Answer,” and I just realized this is how Anglo surnames have always worked.

You can tell they named the aardvark early in the week and the anteater on a Friday.

I bet being full feels so good for the moon.

Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

Men be like, “That’s my dream girl,” then ruin her perspective of love forever.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨