Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Pro Tip: Never make snow angels in a dog park.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Do you ever cycle through the same 4 apps on your phone over and over again, and feel like a tiger pacing its cage at the zoo?

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

A narcissist wants the authority of a king while having the accountability of a toddler.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

They’re making me get out of bed.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,774

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

Shared recently on Threads:

“No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Can someone please invent 8 hours between 9 p.m. and midnight?

Going viral on Telegram:

People who play golf don’t concern me nearly as much as the people who watch it.

Going viral on WeChat:

Unfortunately, I’m not nonchalant or mysterious. I’m just a naturally awkward person who becomes talkative once I’m comfortable.

Spotted on Reddit:

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

Just landed via Discord:

If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Spotted on TikTok:

Cats hear everything. They just don’t care.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Accidentally falling asleep is always the best sleep — and that’s so irritating.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?

He thinks I’m so smart because I read books. Baby, they is FAWKING in these books.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like those books have more plot twists than my life decisions! 📚😂

baby, book, books, humor, i, intelligence, read, reading, sarcasm, smart

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My boss wants me to train some other employees so it’s pretty obvious he has no idea I am completely incompetent.

0

2 months ago

am, boss, employees, humor, i, idea, incompetent, irony, job, management, me, obvious, pretty, train, wants, workplace
Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.

0

2 months ago

accordion, humor, instrument, joke, musical, musical instrument, sentence, survey, unnoticed, wordplay
Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

0

2 months ago

cargo, cargo pocket, closet, everything, humor, left, man, marriage, married, once, over, pocket, relationship, stereotypes, storage, stores, woman
They did so well traumatizing us about teen pregnancy, I’m still traumatized as an adult.

0

2 months ago

adult, education, humor, irony, pregnancy, still, teen, trauma, us, well
You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

0

2 months ago

alcoholic, humor, i, know, never, nose, nostalgia, observation, old, weird
If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.

0

2 months ago

centre, consumerism, humor, mall, observation, sarcasm, shopping, shopping centre, wit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

93 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Not looking for a sugar daddy, but something more of a pay pal.

13 shares on Telegram this month:

Rescuing a cute dog and teaching it how to drive me home from the pub.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

The thief who stole my iPhone could face time.

32 shares on Twitch this month:

I love ketchup from my head to-ma-toes.

32 shares on Instagram this month:

I know there are bigger problems in the world right now, but I’ve just realized I’ve never seen a baby seagull.

32 shares on Snapchat this month:

My handwriting got like five different fonts, depends on my mood and the pen I’m using.

65 shares on X this month:

Situationships are just you pretending you’re okay with getting used until they find someone they actually like.

21 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Going to the beach the day after watching Jaws hits different.

86 shares on WeChat this month:

The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

29 shares on X this month:

I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

I think that McDonalds is putting an unhealthy amount of lettuce in the Big Macs these days.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

They’re making me do work at work.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

I don’t always clear my calculator, but when I do, I hit both C and CE a bunch of times because I don’t know exactly what they do.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

The amount of inappropriate thoughts I have is a little concerning.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Fake laughing at work is mentally exhausting. Please just leave me alone.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

Seen just now on Instagram:

When a lady compliments your facial hair, have the goddamn decency to compliment hers.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I wasn’t sure why the doctor prescribed LSD for my constipation, until I saw a dragon and shit myself.

Just shared via Discord:

People will be like “Nobody cares about your Spotify Wrapped,” and then post a picture of their baby.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

What’s the best job for someone who cries very easily and cannot handle any criticism?

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

Making waves on TikTok:

Hate it when I pull out a winter coat and there’s no money stashed in it.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.

Making waves on Messenger:

My dating checklist is down to “not the Unabomber”.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

He thinks I’m so smart because I read books. Baby, they is FAWKING in these books.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My boss wants me to train some other employees so it’s pretty obvious he has no idea I am completely incompetent.

Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

They did so well traumatizing us about teen pregnancy, I’m still traumatized as an adult.

You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨