Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🚗💨 "I drive home faster than my delivery food on a Friday night! Gotta outpace the chickens waiting for me like I'm late for the house. Speed racer mode: activated! 🏁😂"

after, drive, home, house, humor, i, late, quick, rush, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

0

2 months ago

big, bite, cheese, mouse, party, piece, remember, rocking, tonight, tweet, Tweets
That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

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2 months ago

annoying, annoying moment, autocorrect, communication, conversation, humor, moment, someone, technology, texting
Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

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2 months ago

diet, eating, food, healthy, healthy eating, humor, joke, right, salsa, serving, vegetable
One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying, “What kind of trees are those?”

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2 months ago

activity, aging, aging humor, aging joke, aging realization, change, day, fun, fun activity, humor, joke, kind, life, life change, next, perspective, realization, saying, surprise, trees, young, youth
Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

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2 months ago

advice, cheese, food, Germany, humor, käse, people, pun, sausage, scenario, stock, wurst, Wurst Käse
Either the tables are going to turn, or I’m going to flip them.

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5 months ago

expression, flip, going, humor, idiom, table, tables, turn, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on Reddit this month:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

88 shares on WhatsApp this month:

No one ever talks about the 6th love language (being annoying).

82 shares on Slack this month:

I could be a masseuse, or I could just be pulling your leg.

15 shares on YouTube this month:

I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.

66 shares on Reddit this month:

Bluesky honestly feels like a miracle where you take the most annoying people in the world and stick them in a broken elevator together.

33 shares on Messenger this month:

I wish more dumb people were shy.

29 shares on Reddit this month:

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

18 shares on WeChat this month:

All of my passwords are protected by short-term memory loss.

98 shares on WeChat this month:

Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

I’d like to shrink you down and add you to my keychain.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Adults should get spring break from their jobs.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Got a botched circumcision, now my willy wonka.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Most people who have found themselves are amazed to discover that there is nothing there at all.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

I like how “energy bars” are really just candy bars, and we all pretend to not notice.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Ok, new plan, I’m gonna marry a Kardashian.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Prime numbers are so cunty. Like okay, diva — only divisible by yourself?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

At the strip club sighing until one of the dancers asks me what’s wrong.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I’ve been saying for years that cigs are better for you than vapes, and the vindication I feel now is just orgasmic.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I recently saw a documentary about dinosaurs. They simply ate everyone they didn’t like. I like that concept.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Cancelling a date so I can order pizza and go to bed at 8:30 p.m.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

If you sweat while you eat, it should count as a workout.

Going bananas on X:

Are you bad wifi, cause im feeling no connection here.

Breaking via WeChat:

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a car.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Trending via Threads:

When someone asks me why I’m in a wheelchair, I want to say something ridiculous like, “I’m not standing up until I’ve saved a million.”

Just shared via Threads:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but there’s only 365 shopping days left until Christmas.

Making waves on Threads:

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Spotted on Slack:

If someone wants to spend time with you, they’ll let you know. Get rid of those people.

Trending via YouTube:

If sex was real, I think I would’ve had it by now.

Trending via WeChat:

Just so you know, it’s almost impossible to drink coffee while laying down.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I drive home so quick after work like I’m late for the house.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying, “What kind of trees are those?”

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Either the tables are going to turn, or I’m going to flip them.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨