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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I’m actually really peace-loving, but then there are other people.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

What is the name of the course in medical school where you learn not to take your patients seriously?

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I’ve decided that I’m going to underthink today.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

I wonder what other animals we tried to ride before discovering that horses were cool with it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,412

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

We were never supposed to have this much access to stupid people’s thoughts, beliefs, and opinions.

Making waves on Twitch:

Micro-dosing time travel by going to bed.

Spotted on Snapchat:

That moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don’t know what to do with your life any more.

Spotted on Threads:

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.

Spotted on WeChat:

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

Trending via Snapchat:

Sorry I’m late, I believed the washing machine when it said it only had one minute left in the cycle.

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"May your love life be booming and your job secure in 2022! 🥂 Here's to a year of passion without pink slips! 🕺💼 #Priorities"

amen, fun, hope, i, job, laid, laid off, relationship, wish, year

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

0

2 months ago

activity, cards, date, fanny, fanny pack, fashion, fun, fun activity, matching, pack, packs, play, relationship, right, summer
I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

0

2 months ago

arguing, argument, big, Big Mac, busy, couple, door, hiding, humor, i, mac, next, observation, trash, trash can, vegan, watching, wrapper
The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

0

2 months ago

choice, decision, heart, humor, love, only, organ, vote, wants
The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

0

5 months ago

boomer, gen, Gen Z, generation, humor, inappropriate, inappropriate question, millennial, pause, personal, personal question, question, stare, talk, z
If you’re going to give me some food for thought, it had better be a pizza, or I’m out.

0

2 months ago

better, food, food pun, give, going, humor, me, pizza, pun, thought
Guy smoking weed daily: “I think smoking weed in moderation is fine.”

0

1 month ago

daily, daily habit, fine, guy, habit, humor, i, moderation, smoking, think, weed

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Pinterest this month:

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

86 shares on Twitch this month:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

48 shares on TikTok this month:

There should be significant punishments for people at the grocery store with no spatial awareness.

58 shares on Pinterest this month:

A lot of childhood characters weren’t so much beloved as there wasn’t anything else on the TV.

18 shares on YouTube this month:

When you’re young, weekends are for fun. When you’re older, they’re for recovery.

77 shares on TikTok this month:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

64 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

61 shares on Snapchat this month:

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

10 shares on X this month:

I’m already cold. I know me and my low iron ain’t gonna survive winter.

52 shares on WeChat this month:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

We need a holiday at the end of every summer that honours all the women who wore sundresses.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

The biggest problem with working from home? I want to go home even though I’m already at home.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Of course babies cry when flying, their entire understanding of planes centers around them being eaten.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

I highly recommend having hobbies. It distracts you from things like falling in love.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

“There are lots of benefits to working here. We have fun social events and activities after work!” And what are the benefits?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

I told ChatGPT about us.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Someone told me I wasn’t thinking clearly, as if that’s even an option.

Social Media Log 💫

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

If you’re going to give me some food for thought, it had better be a pizza, or I’m out.

Guy smoking weed daily: “I think smoking weed in moderation is fine.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨