Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Bruschetta is 80% delicious and 20% mess.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

My favorite thing about summer is opening a window for 30 seconds so an insect that hasn’t been identified by science yet can fly into your home.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

On my phone, you’ll never see contacts saved as ‘babe’ or ‘love.’ I save full names—first and last—like a government office.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

My soulmate probably seen my posts and deleted me.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

The USA is having so many disasters and tragedies, you’d almost think it was built on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Being strange is exhausting.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Cake hits so much harder off a plastic fork.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

I’m either freezing, peeing, or starving.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,655

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via TikTok:

If anyone wants to watch the Super Bowl on a large 8k TV, come on over to my place (and bring a large 8k TV).

Just landed via Pinterest:

Egyptians did pretty well for a civilization that wrote entirely in emoji.

Just landed via Messenger:

I plan the silliest murders in my dreams because all I have to do to get away with it is wake up.

Live now on Slack:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

Spotted on Facebook:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’ve surpassed the need for coffee, for I have evolved into a higher state of awesome.

Going bananas on TikTok:

My cat and I talked it over and no we don’t think that I’m crazy.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

Just shared via Reddit:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

I think my phone is broken. I pressed the home button, but I’m still at work.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your phone doesn't understand the urgency of pizza and pajamas 🍕📱😅

broken, button, frustration, home, home button, humor, i, office, phone, still, technology, think, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“This would be better if there was cake” really does ring true in any situation.

0

2 months ago

better, cake, enjoyment, food, humor, ring, situation, true, wish
You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

0

2 months ago

character, comparison, donkey, funny comparison, having, home, humor, just, kid, kids, know, movie, movie character, parenting, Shrek, talking
Getting ghosted by someone who bothered you in the first place is crazy.

0

5 months ago

annoyance, communication, crazy, getting, ghosted, ghosting, interaction, irony, place, relationship, social, social interaction, someone
I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

0

2 months ago

activity, distraction, entertainment, good, humor, i, need, phone, something, watch
I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

0

2 months ago

aging, anything, average, confidence, consider, humor, i, myself, self-awareness, self-deprecating, well
It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

0

2 months ago

awkward, awkward moment, baby, care, embarrassing, embarrassment, face, humor, moment, reaction, silly, silly face

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on Telegram this month:

Haunted house idea: a poorly lit Walmart littered with people you haven’t seen since high school.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

I didn’t mean to gain weight. It happened by snaccident.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

What’s really missing is a day between Saturday and Sunday.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

51 shares on Twitch this month:

Just paid my bills, so don’t ask me to come out. I’m at home getting my money’s worth.

67 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m afraid that AI will quickly realize that the biggest problem on Earth is humans – and then solve the problem.

13 shares on TikTok this month:

Friends with no kids are like: Want to go to New Zealand this Friday?

58 shares on YouTube this month:

I love the smell of freshly brewed delusions in the morning.

39 shares on TikTok this month:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

15 shares on X this month:

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

That gap in my resume is from when I was lost at sea.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Imagine a refund on all the money you spent on alcohol.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams, and Bruno Mars walk into a bar. They didn’t planet that way.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Googling what ASAP means, and having a panic attack.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

All I want I for Christmas is to go to the mall in 1986.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I’d stalk me too, I get it.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I feel useless, but then I remember I breathe out carbon dioxide for plants.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

My body’s check engine light has been on for years.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

Making waves on Instagram:

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.

Trending via Twitch:

Why trust atoms? Because they’ve never been caught fibbing, just fission.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Welcome to your 40s: here’s ten pounds.

Just landed via TikTok:

Little kid on the plane to Boston says “do they speak English there?” and his mom says “kinda!”

Shared recently on YouTube:

If you give me a serious answer to a silly question, I’m giving you a wedgie.

Trending via Slack:

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

Making waves on Reddit:

I’m going to bed, everyone. Try to keep it down.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I think my phone is broken. I pressed the home button, but I’m still at work.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

“This would be better if there was cake” really does ring true in any situation.

You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

Getting ghosted by someone who bothered you in the first place is crazy.

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨