Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Socialism is like polio, it comes back when people forget about the horrible damage it did last time.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I wish my hair had as much volume as my mouth.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Thinking of starting a religion around cheese.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Stretching isn’t enough. I need to be able to disassemble my body like Legos.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,520

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

Sorry I can’t help you move, my hands are in permanent air quotes.

Going viral on Snapchat:

If you don’t have dating allegations with your best friend, you are not bestfriending hard enough.

Shared recently on Threads:

When a man gets married he has a moral obligation to scare his wife when he sneezes.

Live now on Pinterest:

“Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.

Trending via Instagram:

Learning to be Alpha from YouTube.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Nutrition labels should include an “What if I ate the whole thing” section.

Spotted on Instagram:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

Shared recently on X:

I’m surprised some of you are allowed out of your house on your own.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

The more I use social media, the more I see why children shouldn’t.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.

I’m going crazy, y’all. Coming with me?

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Who needs sanity when we can have a road trip in our brains? 🧠🛣️😜

casual, casual speech, coming, crazy, going, humor, invitation, me, speech

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

0

2 months ago

activity, big, big H, creativity, funny idea, garden, h, helicopter, i, idea, luck, me, outdoor, outdoor activity, trap, wish, wish luck
Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

0

2 months ago

awkward, awkward moment, cloth, date, dining, embarrassing, ever, fancy, food, good, luck, moment, restaurant, self-esteem, stain, table, table cloth, white
Drilling for oil is well boring.

0

2 months ago

boring, drilling, humor, industry, joke, oil, pun, well, work
I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

0

2 months ago

dress, expression, fashion, gender, humor, i, individuality, men, style, weather, women
Haircuts should be covered by healthcare.

0

2 months ago

beauty, haircut, healthcare, humor, medical, satire, self-care, should, wellness
Do u guys also have a story in your head, and when you’re bored, you just add more to it and continue from where you left off?

0

2 months ago

activity, add, bored, boredom, creativity, daydreaming, fun, fun activity, guys, head, imagination, just, left, mental, mental activity, story, where

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on Slack this month:

My morning routine consists of talking myself out of quitting my job.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

46 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Long story short, I survived.

19 shares on Telegram this month:

“Get a life!” Have you seen some of the lives out there?

27 shares on X this month:

My husband was unable to find his coat earlier as he’d accidentally hung it up.

82 shares on X this month:

The easiest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.

24 shares on Snapchat this month:

Wake me when AI does housework.

35 shares on TikTok this month:

Oh, I’m so excited to wear Uggs, beanies, and oversized sweaters. I can feel fall creeping up.

81 shares on Messenger this month:

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

62 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Can’t, holding a grudge.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Did 900 crunches today. It was a bag of Cheetos, but still.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Call your family now and ask them what the wifi password is, so they have time to find the little paper it’s written on before Thanksgiving.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

I googled my symptoms, and I just need a day with you in the mountains.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Humans were not meant to have this many passwords.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Amazon cart: Order now and it will arrive today. Amazon confirmation email: LOL, just kidding, it’ll be a week from tomorrow.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

This could have been an email. Me, while attending a wedding ceremony.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I can usually cope with the opinions of others because I don’t listen.

Spotted on WeChat:

If you ever feel like something’s missing in your life, it’s probably me.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Anything is free if you can outrun security. The more you know.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My bad habits got renewed for another season.

Spotted on Instagram:

If you think one of my posts is about you, it isn’t. Except this one.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m writing a fairytale about a printer that just works.

Breaking via Discord:

Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

Going viral on Snapchat:

A good way to get out of a conversation is to take off one of your socks and hand it to the person talking.

Shared recently on WeChat:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m going crazy, y’all. Coming with me?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

Drilling for oil is well boring.

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

Haircuts should be covered by healthcare.

Do u guys also have a story in your head, and when you’re bored, you just add more to it and continue from where you left off?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨