Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Rather than touching grass, I recommend going to a concert and experiencing the live performance of that one song you hold religiously close to your heart.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Accidentally used men’s shower gel today, and I can already feel myself lying for no reason.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

We’ve had far more storms since we started naming them. We’re giving them the attention they crave. Just call it needy wind.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Retiring my wallet condom after two years of active duty. 87 tours with 0 combat deployments.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And they were correct. Honestly, great call from the haters.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

That moment when you’ve gone through Insta, Facebook, X and the new emails and you know you should start working now. Luckily, there’s YouTube.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

You aren’t from the Midwest unless you can spin out in the snow, regain control and keep driving like nothing happened.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,564

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Cracking the ice cubes out probably feels so good for the ice tray.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I hate when teachers put “?” on my work, like I don’t know either.

Going viral on Discord:

I am thick and tired.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

There’s no post-breakup healing process for girls. You just wake up one day and be like, “Ew,” and you’re free.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I love that retail therapy works on me. I am so much happier and at peace when I’m buying things for myself.

Making waves on YouTube:

I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon.

Shared recently on Discord:

People out there having five-year plans, and here I am waking up just hoping I remember what day it is.

Spotted on Threads:

It’s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You’re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

Going viral on Discord:

Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.

Making waves on TikTok:

I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

It’s hard to sleep knowing that Coke is in the fridge.

0
It’s hard to sleep knowing that Coke is in the fridge.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs sleep when you've got Coke keeping the fridge light company? 😂🥤 #NightOwlsUnite"

, , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

Ramen is just anime spaghetti.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

A toddler in their “why” phase makes you realize how little you know.

85 shares on Threads this month:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

77 shares on Twitch this month:

Need a professional way to say, “I do not care, don’t mention this to me again.”

15 shares on Messenger this month:

People argue with me more in my head than they do in real life.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

The only thing we need to bring back is duels.

67 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hey, I noticed you’re completely uninterested in me and couldn’t care whether I live or die. Would you like to build a life together?

20 shares on Instagram this month:

Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.

80 shares on Facebook this month:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe the reason you haven’t found your soulmate is because you don’t have a soul.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My OnlyFans is just me loading the dishwasher correctly.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Do people with lip filler know that they look like that?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,633

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Squirrels get most of their energy from chewing on powerlines, that acorn thing is just for show.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

I have never seen a sad person sliding down a water slide.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Go ahead and get some sleep, everyone. I’ll stay up and handle the overthinking.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

If you can reach enlightenment, can you also reach endarkenment?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Nothing is worse than seeing a gorgeous girl that I’d never approach or stand a chance with and then finding out she has a boyfriend.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Damn, all this overthinking and I still be making dumb decisions.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Slack:

Brother: What are you bringing to Thanksgiving dinner? Me: Wine and unresolved issues. They pair nicely.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Welcome to Twitter: yeah, none of us can sleep either.

Trending via Messenger:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Not to brag but there are so many movies out there that have watched me sleep.

Just shared via Twitch:

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Spotted on Facebook:

We are both insane on the web, I think we can make it work.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

Spotted on Discord:

Everytime I spend $20 I think this is fine because I won’t do it again. And then would you believe.

Going viral on Threads:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Making waves on Discord:

Whenever my hormones try to get me to reproduce after all, I go to IKEA and watch the goings-on there. After that, I’m good again.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴