Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Instagram should let you extend the run of one story for another 24 hours if the intended target didn’t see it.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

You guys can continue with the week, I’ve stopped here.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Going to look at the small picture for a while. Tired of seeing the big picture. Too much picture.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Drinking 3L of water daily helps you avoid other people’s drama because you’re too busy peeing. Stay hydrated.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

All my life lessons were learned by watching people who took my advice.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I don’t have a favourite person, but I do have a favourite cheese.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

May your coffee kick in, before reality does.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,663

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

Blood pressure too high to chase these hoes.

Making waves on Instagram:

Apparently there is a bird fight club who holds their meetings outside my window at about 5am.

Shared recently on TikTok:

That moment when you have to restart a song because the conversations in your head got too loud and you missed half the song.

Just landed via Pinterest:

When I take a walk, I bring dog treats and people treats. I almost never mix them up.

Making waves on X:

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

Making waves on Discord:

The female ability to be able to guess exactly which girl it is out of his 740 following.

Just shared via Facebook:

A credit card is kind of like a gift card to every store.

Going viral on TikTok:

With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

Live now on Snapchat:

A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early, if you ask me.

Just landed via Slack:

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Forget the camel, I'm just here to find out if Carl has a Yelp rating 😂👐🐪

animal, camel, Carl, desert, horse, humor, i, name, rental, return, return trip, through, travel, trip, true

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

0

2 months ago

comparison, cooking, essential, essential oil, food, humor, me, oil, sarcasm, taco
I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.

0

2 months ago

channel, day, different, discovery, Discovery Channel, entertainment, every, humor, i, media, should, television, think, TV
You looked so beautiful and combative as we were detained for questioning.

0

2 months ago

beautiful, beauty, combative, contrast, detained, humor, interaction, personality, personality contrast, questioning, sarcasm, situation, unexpected, unexpected situation
“Time After Time” is my favorite song about doing the dishes.

0

2 months ago

after, chores, dish, dishes, doing, favorite, humor, music, song, time
You should just baseline mistrust every single politician at every level until they prove themselves worthy of liking.

0

2 months ago

belief, cynicism, every, humor, just, level, liking, mistrust, opinion, politician, politics, prove, satire, should, single, skepticism, trust
It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

0

2 months ago

another, back, coming, frustration, humor, keeps, mad, return, storm, thing, weather, winter, yelling

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on TikTok this month:

Sorry I marked myself as safe on Facebook after your PowerPoint presentation.

74 shares on Messenger this month:

All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.

35 shares on X this month:

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

77 shares on Messenger this month:

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

73 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Polish girls are just winter Latinas.

50 shares on TikTok this month:

Do vape shops and nail salons actually make money, or is my town’s economy one big laundering scheme?

20 shares on X this month:

Computers used to scream out in pain when we connected to the internet. This was a warning and we did not heed it.

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me and the fellas making welcome gift baskets for the aliens.

41 shares on WeChat this month:

My five-year plan is to get back my whimsy, joy, childlike wonder.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

I really don’t care what happens to me romantically anymore.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

When I quit my job I’m setting one last OOO message that just says “your email will never find me again”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

The world started without permission again.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

My talents include sneaking out of work early on a Friday.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a checkout line before in their life.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Since I started following the wisdom of ancient Chinese philosopher Fuk Yu, my life has been so much better…

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

The more nicknames I have for you, the more I like you.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

If you know karate, you shouldn’t have to pay for stuff.

Just landed via WeChat:

Discovered a new coping mechanism called lashing out and making your loved ones resent you.

Just landed via Messenger:

You can tell they named the aardvark early in the week and the anteater on a Friday.

Spotted on X:

For Christmas, I’d like to figure it all out.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Kinda rude that your reward for struggling through stuff is still dying at the end anyway.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

First date idea: we deactivate your Instagram.

Just shared via Telegram:

Make sure you stock up on condoms, so you don’t produce any more idiots.

Trending via Slack:

The neighbor sneezes loudly from the balcony. And because I’m a polite person, I shout loudly: Disgusting!

Live now on Messenger:

Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.

You looked so beautiful and combative as we were detained for questioning.

“Time After Time” is my favorite song about doing the dishes.

You should just baseline mistrust every single politician at every level until they prove themselves worthy of liking.

It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨