Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

If your girlfriend doesn’t go a little psycho on you from time to time, then she’s not in love with you, sweetie.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

I think every app should, by law, let you deactivate all of its short-form video content.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

Selling porn is gross, but selling food and small household items is grocer.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

I love wearing sunglasses. Am I looking at your face? Am I looking at your ass? No one knows.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

Revenge? No. I just post hot selfies and let the algorithm do God’s work.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

20s: LOL! 30s: OMG! 40s: WTF!

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

“Communism sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work in practice.” Capitalism doesn’t even sound good in theory.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,667

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

You have a bucket list, I have my head in a bucket, we are not the same.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Good morning to everyone except those who need approval from strangers on the internet.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

This is about the time of year where my enthusiasm about shoveling snow turns into “it will probably melt on it’s own”.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Let me seduce you with my knowledge on useless things.

Just landed via YouTube:

My favorite Christmas Eve tradition is the one where I tell my kids we have to get the house spotless, or Santa won’t come.

Just shared via Discord:

Could a mosquito drink blood out of a cup or something or are they legally required to Capri Sun my legs all summer?

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Sorry, I ghosted you. I just felt like you were gonna ghost me, so I did it first.

Spotted on Instagram:

Adults should get spring break from their jobs.

Just shared via TikTok:

Everyone who dramatically ‘quits’ social media is back in 48 hours like it was just a trial separation.

Just landed via Threads:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Name change? 😂 I better start posting more cat videos! 🐱📸 #DesperateTimes #FollowerFrenzy"

family, followers, humor, joke, kids, last, media, name, parent, parenting, should, social, social media

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

0

2 months ago

cautionary, cautionary tale, humor, lotus, taking, tale, time, time off, vacation, white, White Lotus, work
Not trying to brag but this cop says my rear end is smoking.

0

2 months ago

brag, cop, end, humor, joke, rear, rear end, smoking, trying
I feel like everyone who has ever had a hamster has some kind of traumatic experience with it.

0

2 months ago

animal, animal humor, ever, everyone, experience, feel, hamster, humor, i, kind, pet, traumatic, traumatic experience
Things I don’t want in my future house: An angry man.

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2 months ago

angry, angry man, don’t, future, future house, home, house, humor, i, living, living situation, man, situation, things, things I don’t want, want
I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

0

2 months ago

bad, bad luck, belief, humor, irony, luck, superstitious
Be bold, be italic, but never regular.

0

2 months ago

bold, confidence, creativity, design, humor, italic, never, regular, typography

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on Discord this month:

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

43 shares on X this month:

An article of clothing left on the floor long enough becomes clean again because the germs eventually get bored and leave.

53 shares on Discord this month:

Fall in love? I can barely fall asleep.

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

Being Leonardo DiCaprio is like driving in a school zone. You don’t go above twenty-five.

10 shares on X this month:

Maybe your baby is crying because he knows you don’t have rizz.

14 shares on Discord this month:

Listen to your body? The body that craves a lethal amount of Kinder Bueno?

82 shares on Instagram this month:

Toilets are not a crime scene, traces may be removed!

36 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

56 shares on Facebook this month:

My diet was going really well until I woke up.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

If you have gray in your beard, you can hit it.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

How can vampires enjoy drinking our hot blood in the summer and other thoughts that keep me up at night.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

One person’s logic is another one’s “what the heck?”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

There’s a rhyming Italian expression for saying “take it or leave it” that goes “o mangi questa minestra o salti dalla finestra”. It means “either eat this soup or throw yourself out the window”.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

My dad told my sister’s new boyfriend to stand at the end of the picture so he can crop him out whenever she dumps him.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

Gonna close my bank account and keep all my money on me, like Sonic the Hedgehog.

Live now on Facebook:

I tried to embrace my flaws. They filed a restraining order.

Just landed via Discord:

Unfortunately, when you don’t burden people with your problems, they assume you don’t have any. Lol.

Freshly posted on Discord:

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

Shared recently on Messenger:

First you’re cringe, then you’re the blueprint.

Just shared via Instagram:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

Just shared via Twitch:

The first step is admitting that the other person is the one with the problem.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

You know you’re getting old when you have to watch shows that are in English with subtitles.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

All mushrooms are edible. Some only once.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

Not trying to brag but this cop says my rear end is smoking.

I feel like everyone who has ever had a hamster has some kind of traumatic experience with it.

Things I don’t want in my future house: An angry man.

I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

Be bold, be italic, but never regular.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨