Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

I’m sorry that I bit you, I was trying to flirt.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

All I’m saying is, there are too many songs about love and not enough songs about evenly layered nachos.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I really think tossing and turning at night should be counted as exercise.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

I love when someone is like “I’m funny because I have trauma and it’s a coping mechanism” and it’s like “Okay, not to add to your trauma, but you’re not funny!”

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

You used to calm me on my cell phone!

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

One of the most amazing things in nature is that the basketball hoop is the perfect size to fit a basketball through.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

A simple “hi” can be the beginning of two years of therapy.