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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a Like.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

I will not stop replying with gifs. I am a Millennial, it’s my birthright.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I wish tree puns were more poplar.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want a joint bank account, but I ain’t had it yet.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,353

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Next time I feel incompetent at my job, I hope I remember that someone once pushed a live software update that crashed half the planet.

Making waves on Twitch:

I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Studies show that people with high IQs tend to be lazy, or something like that. I didn’t read the whole article.

Spotted on WeChat:

Hell, yes, I work out. Somebody has to support the ibuprofen industry.

Spotted on Discord:

Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

Making waves on Facebook:

Making art is making love to the world.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

What happened to the huge corporate Christmas parties you see in all the ’90s movies? Seems like that doesn’t exist at all anymore.

Spotted on Threads:

Farting, but with eye contact.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I don’t want to go.

Trending via Discord:

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

My family passed down mood swings and anxiety instead of money or houses.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Guess we inherited emotional real estate instead of actual real estate! 🤪🏠🫣

anxiety, family, health, house, houses, humor, inheritance, mental, mental health, money, mood, mood swing, swing, swings

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

0

2 months ago

coping, everything, fine, humor, lame, pretending, reality, working
My future husband is probably enjoying a nice summer with his first wife… but the seeds of discontent are there.

0

2 months ago

discontent, enjoying, future, future husband, humor, husband, jealousy, marriage, nice, relationship, seeds, summer, wife
“I’m at the age where, if I use the wrong pillow at night, it hurts to turn my head the next day.”

0

1 month ago

age, aging, day, discomfort, head, humor, hurts, i, neck, next, night, pain, pillow, sleep, turn, where, wrong
A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.

0

2 months ago

afraid, digital, digital relationship, etiquette, happening, hate, humor, internet, internet humor, knowing, life, media, moment, online, online life, pressure, privacy, relationship, silence, social, social media, social media etiquette, social pressure, unfriend, unfriending, us
Welcome to adulthood. The weekend is your only time to catch up on everything, but also your only time to do absolutely nothing.

0

2 months ago

absolutely, activity, adulthood, catch, catch up, doing, doing nothing, everything, free, free time, free time activity, leisure, nothing, only, relaxation, time, weekend, welcome
I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.

0

2 months ago

age, good, growing, growing up, high, high school, i, memory, mom, never, news, nostalgia, relationships, remember, school, time, where

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on TikTok this month:

There should be a three-day weekend: one day to do nothing, one day to do something, and one day to do laundry.

51 shares on Reddit this month:

Forget about “long story short”… I’m gonna start saying “short story long,” and take you on a journey you didn’t ask for.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

40 shares on Telegram this month:

Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

48 shares on Reddit this month:

Liking sports is great because you’ll have a bad day, then here your team comes to make it worse.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

My favorite unit of measurement is smithereens.

17 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes I’m grateful that thoughts don’t appear as bubbles over our heads.

77 shares on Reddit this month:

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

99 shares on Slack this month:

Remember when a series of unfortunate events was a book and not your life?

32 shares on Messenger this month:

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Who called it America and not the fast food and the furious?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

I’ve literally never copied and pasted text and thought, “I’m so glad it kept the formatting and font from the other document.”

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

How is every author the #1 New York Times bestseller?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Me, watching porn: they’re just going to let that pizza get cold?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Nothing I do for money is passion-based. It’s just pure hatred for being broke.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel booking website.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Words I heard most when I ran errands with my dad: “Wait in the truck.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

I don’t have a five-year plan because every two years I realize I need a different life.

Just shared via Reddit:

If I unsubscribe from your email list, I definitely do not need you to send a follow-up email to confirm.

Seen just now on YouTube:

If you think I’m rude, you should hear the voices in my head.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.

Going viral on Discord:

Therapists probably have to struggle so hard not to ask to see pictures of the people their clients are obsessing over.

Trending via Pinterest:

I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.

Trending via Slack:

The best way to describe this year is to say it feels like a year of Mondays.

Breaking via Snapchat:

It’s not a competition, but if it was I would win.

Going viral on X:

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My family passed down mood swings and anxiety instead of money or houses.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

My future husband is probably enjoying a nice summer with his first wife… but the seeds of discontent are there.

“I’m at the age where, if I use the wrong pillow at night, it hurts to turn my head the next day.”

A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.

Welcome to adulthood. The weekend is your only time to catch up on everything, but also your only time to do absolutely nothing.

I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨